Keeping It... Real?

So I missed writing yesterday because I was keeping busy. I am so proud of myself. However, went into town to drop off a secret santa present and the crowds made me so nervous I started to shake slightly. I hope that I can overcome this because I work with people and I want to be able to return to work in the new year.

I had weird dreams the other night too. Much to do with the pills I am taking as the depression. One featured my boyfriends ex. God I can't stand that woman. Too much water has passed under the bridge for him ever to go back there, but he has been "working late" a lot. I have trust in him, and the little angel on my shoulder knows he wouldn't do anything to jepodise us, but that ******* devil on the other shoulder is now making me feel like its a load of crap and he's doing something silly.

Oh I hate this depression. It plays havoc with your brain. I am very much feeling better, I just need to work on the crowds thing and I am sure I will be OK.

Going to try and be proactive today and tidy the house... I have said that for days now. This procratination is a nightmare... but today is my day to shine. I can prove to myself that I am more than just what I feel. I can be anything I like. Yay me.... right??
Shedbeef Shedbeef
26-30, F
2 Responses Dec 15, 2012

Don't think of your bf ex...BITE your tongue and say I am going to beat the **** out of my unfaithful BF.She is not unfaithful...he is.I am a man I know how he thinks..trying to get the best of both world.Look up and smile at the sunshine!There are plenty of good fish out there.Throw the rotten ones away..they are not worth crying for!I give you a big bear hug...and ta! Ta!

Yes, yay you. Way to keep it real. :) I love those days where I finally decide to do that cleaning I've been wanting to do. It's so nice to get it done, and I'll feel a lot better when I have.