I Was Just Reading Some Of The Ramblings I Wrote On Ep While I Was Feeling Suicidal

i'm SHOCKED. literally shocked. i'm actually quite... "shaken" by the thoughts. and i feel like barfing right now. and visually disturbing too (like at times i would type very badly because i was writing with my fingers trembling, tears and my eyes, i couldn't see clearly). i had no idea i was that bad back then. WOW. i have a boyfriend and i stopped being depressed, it's like that life was a LONG time ago and it seems so distant. i thought about jumping in front of a train. and i remember nearly overdosing on pills. i cannot believe myself. i can't believe anyone would want to date me in that state. i was so scary.
peppersasen peppersasen
Jan 17, 2013