I Hope

I hope my kids have a much better life then mine. I feel I fail them as a mother. I didn't see until now I realize that i could have done so much more to guide them. They have been through so much. My daughter who now she is 25. She was diagnosed with anxiety, depression, anger issues. She graduated high scool at 17 she left to Texas she was going to college. She called one night to tell me th at was not for her and that I need to sign for her to join the army. I was devasted, My husband and I try to talk her out of it but her answer was if you guys don't sign as I turn eighteen im joing. We thought it was going to pass. She came back home. She tried college here in our county and tried to get a job. She woould get disapointed. She oukd always say there is nothing here. Couple of months pass and she leaves to visit my younger sister for the summer who happen to live in texas. She calls one night and she tells us she was going to go to bootcamp because she join the army. I was devasted and my husband was speashless. She wrote to me telling me that she loved me and not to worry that she was going to be ok. I would write her a letter every other day. I wanted her to always be getting mail. She send me a special card made from her, she would tell me how much she loved me and miss me and apologizing for being a bad daughter. She said that she really wanted to be there. That was made for her and that she belong there. She graduated with honors. Two years pass and ofcourse she would be deploying. She meets this kid she says she loves him. And they want to get married. We tried, parents tried to make her wait. No I fail again, she gets her wedding dress and my son sending me letters from bookcamp in the marines. She gets married my son graduates with honors too. She goes overseas Kuwait and my son for training at North Carolina. My daughter comesback after fourteen months overseas she gets stationed in Savannah Georgia. Being there she goes through Three miscarriages. Her husband is not treating her good. My son is comes home for a break and he catches his girlfriend cheating on him. I fail them again. Months pass and finally after so much she decides to divorce. My son braks the news to us that he is heen deployed to Afghanistan. They both suffer mentally from those deployments. I fail them. I gave two of my tresures to our country. My third son he told us he didn't want to know anything that had to do with military. He graduated high school with honors and he stared going to college to be in the medical field. I fail my kids and I feel our country fail them too.