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Afraid To Try Again

I recently started to go out with this great girl. We went out for about 2 months, but it felt alot longer than that. I've known her for a while now, but i never really talked to her before this. She was so much like me in almost every single way from past relationships to health problems that were eventually overcome. First time we talked, we sat at a Wendy's for 5 straight hours without a pause in the conversation. It was one of the most incredible conversations I have had with someone in years.

After that, things seemed to progress nicely. I started picking her up from work and we would normally spend most of the rest of the day together. I would get text messages from her, and would have a smile for the rest of the day. I was on cloud 9. I've been in relationships before, but this one was so different. I did things for this girl i have never done before. I learned to cook her favorite dish, and went to the grocery store at 12 am just to buy fruit and cut it up and have it ready to drop it off at her work the next morning. I honestly wanted to give her everything i could.

Then one day, she completely stopped talking to me. A few days later, I received a facebook message saying how she got things wrong, and she knew i was just being nice to her because that was my nature, and did not want to keep on going out with me because she knew i would never be interested in her the way she wanted me to be. I responded saying she did not get things wrong and i also wanted the same thing. We went out a couple days later, and finally kissed. I was so happy, i felt like a teenager again. We went out again the next day and it was just as great. i really felt like i was falling in love, and in seemed like she was feeling something also.

Then one night, we are at the park and i get a call from my best friend, so i answer, only to hear the voice of my friends girlfriend asking me where i am at. My friend could not talk as he was driving, but i overheard him tell her to tell me that he was also going to that same park. At this point, my phone died and i tell her it was my friend. Next day, she tells me she got upset because i said it was a guy friend, but she heard a girl's voice, and got very upset.

Things were never the same after this. She said I lied to her, that it was a girl and i said it was a guy and she does not tolerate lies of any kind. I feel i did not lie to her because it truly was my best friend calling me on his cell phone. I have never been the type of guy to cheat or even talk to other girls while in a relationship. I'm incapable of being that guy. I knew she had trust issues, but never suspected they were that great. I explained the situation, but she did not believe me saying i lied.

It just feels like i really tried my best with her. I did things i never did with anyone else. I put it all out there, only for things to go to the ******* over phone call. I think, only if you would have not answered or said, "it was my friend's girlfriend", things might have been different. I felt angry because she judged me based on past experiences she has had. I feel so alone. I got used to being with her. I just am so afraid to try again. To start all over again, to put myself out there again. I just don't want to get hurt again, but even so more, i do not want to disappoint or hurt anyone over something i might do. I'm scared to start over.
Godito5 Godito5 26-30, M 2 Responses Jun 12, 2012

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This relationship is comming wrong from the start, you should stay away this woman.

I understand how you feel totally. I have been hurt as well but if you don't open your heart you will lose the opportunity to feel the pure joy ,happiness and passion and hopefully deep friendship that person can bring to your life. I hope your heart heals and you are able to experience love again.