Feels Like I Woke Up From A Dream

In October 2011, I met this boy.

At first he seemed just like a regular boy. I dismissed any thought of him past him being cute until one of my friends started to notice that I had a crush on him.

My friend poked and proded until i finally told him that i only founded him attractive by his looks but not by his personality. My friend insisted that I actually get to know him first before I made that judgement because that guy had actually liked me too.

I listened to him. why to this day I don't know why. I started to get to know him. and I like him as a friend. We were into the same things, we shared the same humor, and it seemed like i was looking for him and he was looking for me..

As time went on, he started expresses his feelings for me, and I did not know what to do. I didn't not want to rush things. I was afraid. But the more he said sweet everythings, the more i started to feel for him and eventually i started having feelings for him too.

He was saying that he loved me even before we got together and saying and doing all the right things. I didn't actually start saying the L word until 2 weeks after we started dating. In march of 2012.

He waited until I was ready to have sex, he didn't rush me. He cared about how I feeling and i swear it felt like I had walked into one of my fantasy worlds.

May 2012 is when the fantasy started to shatter.

He, overnight, stop coming over. answering my texts, my calls.
and when i mean overnight, I literally mean that.

I was potential wifey one moment, and then a stranger the next.

It was two weeks of him avoiding me, not listening to me, treating me like what we had never happened.

and then one night me and him talked and he said, HE LIED, about him dealing with school work and some personally issues about him not being able to take of me and some other bull.

(The one thing I had ever requested was to not be lied to. That hurts me more than anything).

The very next day, some girl facebooked me saying that I need to back away from her man.

My whole shattered. She was saying how they had been dating for two weeks already and some other stuff.

So we broke up. 3 months and still dealing with it.

I don't know how to let it go. I have never felt so special before. I loved it. It felt like i woke up from a dream.

He broke up with the girl, and started to talking to me how he was sorry and he wanted to be with me. But I don't know. I want the fantasy back but the trust is gone. My heart was broken.

I really can not see anyone past him.

But I am scared of getting hurt again


Pandora7Asylum Pandora7Asylum
26-30, F
Jul 23, 2012