I Understand

When I was pregnant, I was terrified.  I was scared of the pain of childbirth, I was scared that something was going to go wrong, and I was scared that I wasn't going to be a good mother.

However, at this point in my life, I don't remember the pain of childbirth.  I remember that the contractions were horrible... but I know that it won't stop me from having another child someday.  I was lucky enough to have a near perfect labor and delivery.  There were a few issues, but they were easily resolved by our excellent medical staff.  My daughter is 3 now... and I still question my parenting skills now and then, but I find that trusting my intuition is really the best thing I can do.

My mom actually gave me the best advice... that it's better to just relax and go with the flow.  Once you get to the delivery room, you are going to have a baby and there is no way around that!  So why stress about it?  Sure, it's easier said than done... but I feel like I definitely had an easier time with it (mentally at least!) because I wasn't letting myself turn into a nervous wreck.

Good luck to all you future mommies out there!  You will do great!
frontier frontier
31-35, F
9 Responses Sep 29, 2007

i had my first child 10 years ago my daughter i know how u feel as i felt the same the pain was un berable i went into labour and had no support from any 1 after i had her i 4got about the pain and in its place came love u will b ok just listen 2 the gd stories as i got told some terifying labour 1s and it put me off i have since had 2 boys aged 7 and 4 they r all my life and it will b the same 4 u after wards if poss have some 1with u i did my mum and she kept me calm gd luck 2 all new parents and those who will b in the future anon

i cant wait to become a mother i want to experience it all good, bad, happy and sad

I am due in 5 day's and can honestly say I am petrified. I am excited at the thought of bringing home my baby girl and becoming a mum, but it's just the unknown that scares me. I sit here now and feel like I could cry (probably due to the hormones to lol) but I am literally scared that I am not going to do a good job, I am scared that something might be wrong with her, I am scared that I won't bond with her, so many different emotions are creeping up on me as D day arrives. Reading stories like the above make me feel more sane and gets my heart rate back down again. Like Mariposa say's many women have done this before so I have to believe that I am going to get through this and that my little angel is going to be perfect. xoxoxoxoo

First, as a woman expecting her first child in 6 weeks I'd like to say that it is a little scary. I take heart knowing that millions of women give birth every year and come out just fine, but I think it's the mystery of it all that gets me a little afraid. I don't know what to expect, or if I'll KNOW when the time is right... I just plan to follow my instincts and do what women have been doing for thousands of years; I will say though that there is NOTHING immature about truly fearing childbirth; it's not a thing you can ever be fully prepared for so fear is natural. I think doing a thing when you are afraid to better yourself of your life is VERY mature. Much respect to the women who are afraid and have children anyway. :)

As a bloke I fully understand what your mum was saying, and before you girls jump down my throat about childbirth I agree I have no idea of the pain and emotions every woman feels when giving birth ,however comments from the likes of julialynn as a bloke completley bewilder me, as a proud dad of two ,24 and 19 I agree with your mum go with the flow trust your own judgement things will be fine, if you mess up it shows we are all human,enjoy yours and there lives all the best

You are really immature. What kind of a person would "confess" terror about bringing a soul into the world? you are really an embarassment to your children. Gosh, if I had a daughter like You I would change my name.

Look around, where ever you are, see the people, see the old ones, the young ones, the babies, they all got here the same way, one at a time, and they all had a frightened Mother I would guess....obviously, it doesn't stop most of us from doing it again, if it did, there woudln't be people all over the planet. You'll be fine!

I am an ABC News reporter looking for women who are afraid of pregnancy...or who had a birth trauma and are afraid to get pregnant again. If you can share with me, please e-mail susan.james@abc.com or 212-456-4875.

Thanks, that helped me a lot. I'm not pregnant but one day hope to have a child and I have panic attacks. I worry now, about what comes with being pregnant, making sure my baby gets what it needs in the womb, if something bad happens while pregnant or the delivery, or doubting my parenting abilities.