Met when I was 17 moved in with him practically straight away. We moved into our own place after a year and have both been through uni and had several jobs after. We've been financial losers since the beginning as neither of us has held a job for very long or made very much. I was given a diagnosis of depression and bpd but he won't accept it or understand it or give me any care or consideration. Just snap out of it get over it you're a loser your lazy your making excuses. So now I've decided to leave him. I've arranged to move out but I feel now petrified to go. I move into a new room by myself in four days and as much as I'm excited I'm also freaked out that I'm making the wrong decision. Maybe I'm being selfish, thoughtless unloving and ungrateful. It's left me trapped in my house I've now practically lost another job. I've given up caring about work I feel desperately useless and trapped and unsure and worried and also excited to start a fresh scared I'm going to throw away a relationship that may be the best ill ever have??
Bpdomg Bpdomg
26-30, F
2 Responses Aug 27, 2014

The good news is, moving out doesn't need to be permanent. Maybe you just need time to think. A little reflection might be good for both of you. If he loves you, you won't lose him. If he doesn't love you, you're better off to cut your losses now.

It's NOT the best you'll ever have! It's the only one you've let yourself know. 17 is pretty young. Look in the mirror and ask yourself "If I knew THEN, what I know NOW, would I REALLY be afraid to try something new? You can always come play at my house for a while, if you want.

Yeh it's a good point.... Something to ponder on. I don't really feel I've changed/developed much/enough !!