I'm Scared To Be Alone

I feel as though I don't really have anyone to talk to nowadays. Times have been hard for me socially since I became a pregnant teenager. I feel abandoned by my friends and in times like these I always had my boyfriend to at least comfort me and make me not feel like a total loser. Ever since I was 15 I have never been single. I dated my first boyfriend for over a year and left him for my "current" baby daddy. I have had much drama as many high schoolers can say and I've always had a guy to lean on. I guess I'm starting to realize that many people that I know can't be trusted because now matter how geniune I think I am, I always get screwed over. Now, I really am alone because I had to kick my boyfriend to the curb because he was getting abusive emotionally and physically. Even though I don't really have good friends I would still want to get out of the house at least once a week after watching my baby all the time but hey, I need a break and I would still like to feel normal sometimes. But, he wouldn't want me to go out, he'd sabotage me hanging out and has even broke my phone. I know our relationship is unhealthy, that's why I left but it takes so much strength not to take him back because I don't want to be alone. I want someone to talk too. Times are hard and I can only try to stay optimistic and keep my sanity for my daughter. I look forward to college because I know there will be a new pool of people to meet, I hope I can find someone to relate to.
jackibear jackibear
18-21, F
1 Response May 12, 2012

don't be scared, you have the most amazing thing in the world- your own Daughter, and she loves you without any Limits or obligations. and this is what i'm telling myself everyday, about my son.