Freaked Out By Men
Men scare me. I don't know why. On a conscious level, I know that they're human just like me. A lot of them are lovely and very nice. I get along with men better than I do with women sometimes.
They start talking to me and as long as I think they're just being friendly, I remain bubbly and cheerful and conversant.
But the moment one of them looks at me in a romantic/sexual way, I get so freaked out that I want to run screaming from the room. I can't speak, I feel like they're looking at me like a piece of meat, I close up mentally.
Like the other day, I was asked out by this guy. I was so traumatized by the experience because he was kind of forward, telling me how beautiful I was etc. Basically I'm petrified to meet him and actually burst out crying yesterday because of it. Now surely that is not right.
I've had dreams where I've been in bed with some random guy and he's stifling me by wrapping his arms and legs around me. Every time I pry his arms or legs loose he just wraps them around me tighter until I'm feeling completely suffocated.