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Scared to Open Up

Sometimes I feel as if my romantic involvements with other people are cursed.  I have dated many people but have only felt genuine connections with a handful; yet for whatever reason, those connections have always fallen apart for reasons outside of my control.



Now I am hesitant to develop a long term relationship because I am afraid that as soon as I start to fall in love with somebody else, the situation will change and I will lose them in some way. 



So I remain single by choice, hoping that one day I will meet somebody who might remove this curse that has been placed on me. 
Seraph1m Seraph1m 26-30, M 11 Responses Aug 6, 2006

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Don't think you're cursed. You're just going through something a lot of us do. The way to build long-lasting relationships is by taking it slow.

Oh sweetie...the only thing that's important is that YOU can love in a way that's comfortable. That's what really matters- both hearts loving both ways.

dont be hard on yourself....just be careful when you open up yourself...try not to live in fairy tales...nothing is perfect and so are we..just enjoy what ever life has to offer and make the best out of it :)

Well do u know what , iam 28 years old and i have been facing this all my life.WEll i totally understand what u are talking about, well to open up isnt an easy task but u just cant keep on expecting that u will lose someone if u fall in love with him , as they always say u meet many frogs to find the right person.The truth is i used to beleive that there is always soemone out there for each, but i dnt want to doubt it, it is a dream that we all want to have in mind, something that we all aim to have.<br />
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By the way i usually sit with my friends and they keep on telling me that i should date, so i did and none worked out as i get bored too easilly while iam nt a flirt and to add to all this i have a very sociable character and with many friends as i met a lot of people throughtout my life , i am really nice as a friend but if someone approaches me i have this weird attitude , so in less than a week the guy goes crasy.But we have to say u live in ur life but u have to know what love is, i never had this feeling , yet i know that god is really generous to make u feel it even if once , and even if it wasnt meant to be, then u had nice memories.<br />
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Afterall we live our life and learn, love and hate, take and give, and it is all between the hands of fate, and whatever is meant to be is meant to be.

Well do u know what , iam 28 years old and i have been facing this all my life.WEll i totally understand what u are talking about, well to open up isnt an easy task but u just cant keep on expecting that u will lose someone if u fall in love with him , as they always say u meet many frogs to find the right person.The truth is i used to beleive that there is always soemone out there for each, but i dnt want to doubt it, it is a dream that we all want to have in mind, something that we all aim to have.<br />
<br />
By the way i usually sit with my friends and they keep on telling me that i should date, so i did and none worked out as i get bored too easilly while iam nt a flirt and to add to all this i have a very sociable character and with many friends as i met a lot of people throughtout my life , i am really nice as a friend but if someone approaches me i have this weird attitude , so in less than a week the guy goes crasy.But we have to say u live in ur life but u have to know what love is, i never had this feeling , yet i know that god is really generous to make u feel it even if once , and even if it wasnt meant to be, then u had nice memories.<br />
<br />
Afterall we live our life and learn, love and hate, take and give, and it is all between the hands of fate, and whatever is meant to be is meant to be.

Well, I'm kind of he same as king of spades, I've tried a lot of relationships but probably the only ones i felt safe in. When ive really like someone ive never dared to be myself or show them I care, so nothing that I wanted to happen ever happened (because of the way I acted), and I sit here and wait and hope that one day someone will care enough to bother to be patient a see through it in time. But I guess that might never happen, yet if it doesn't it dissapoint me, does true love still exist? I see all these fake relationships around me, i know few I truly believe are happy so whats the percentige of couple who actually dote each other? id say only 10 %.

Well, I'm kind of he same as king of spades, I've tried a lot of relationships but probably the only ones i felt safe in. When ive really like someone ive never dared to be myself or show them I care, so nothing that I wanted to happen ever happened (because of the way I acted), and I sit here and wait and hope that one day someone will care enough to bother to be patient a see through it in time. But I guess that might never happen, yet if it doesn't it dissapoint me, does true love still exist? I see all these fake relationships around me, i know few I truly believe are happy so whats the percentige of couple who actually dote each other? id say only 10 %.

Hi Misasja, well said. You're absolutely right. I've come to discover that that is all true since first writing this story (more than a year ago!). I'm the only one who can make myself happy. There's no perfect person out there.

if by perfect you mean perfect for YOU specifically, I beleive there is. It's just that you have to open up to find out... and i know, i know, what if they're NOT the one and you end up setting youself up for heartbreak. The question is, are you willing to take the chance, for the desired outcome?

Stop waiting for somebody to rescue you. You can never be happy this way. Also, the fear of losing the person you love will always linger there until we let our lives to be dependent upon another person's presence. We all do that, including me. I have a bf for 3 years, trying to stay balanced. Ultimately I'm exercising strength in myself, I know that I'm gonna be fine by myself even after losing someone. But I can't rely on others to save me or make my life better. I have to do it myself. That's the journey of life.

I AM SORRY; BE PATIENT; YOU WILL SURE FIND THE REAL LOVE; IT IS MOSTLY DUE TO OUR BRAIN SET OR SET OF CHARACTER THAT GETS US INTO SIMILAR SITUATIONS; BUT DONT GIVE UP; SOMEONE YOU WILL MEET WHO WILL GET YOU OUT, OF DAILY ROUTINAL LIFE AND THINKING; SOME YOU WILL MEET WHO WILL CHANGE YOUR PLANS FOR BETTER ONES;IF YOUR ARE A WOMAN; TRY TO BE NATURAL TRADISHNAL CAREING ; ; BECAUSE TO BE SUBMISIVE HAS IT OWN BLESSINGS TO BE REWARDED; BUT THE INFLUENS OF WOMANS LIB; HAS MESSED UP THE THIER LIVES AND OF MEN; ; I WONDER HOW OLD YOU COULD BE; AND WHERE YOU COULD BE? RIGHT NOW; ON THE GODS GOOD EARTH THERE SOME ONE SPACIAL FOR YOU; ; DONT GO FOR SHORT CIRCUITS; BUT WHERE YOUR ARE NEEDED AND WHERE YOU NEED SOME ONE AND REWARDED MUTUALLY; ; THINK POSITIVE ; AS LIFE IS TOO SHORT..

cursed?<br />
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What is love to you?