The Devil's Own Handy Work......I'm sitting on the lounge floor, Sarah’s brushing my hair watching X Factor on the television. The lights are turned down low and I’m half asleep. Out the corner of my eye I noticed something move across the carpet and it was fast.
First thought was “No need to panic, I must have just imagined that” but noooo Bloody Hell! What was that ??? A spider the size of a small domestic dwelling is leggin it across the room and its coming straight for me. Aaaarrrggggg !!! Launches off the floor like a scolded cat, my hearts just missed a beat and I feel like I’ve lost a year of my life. Sarah’s laughing, thinks it’s really funny.
The spider isn’t really that big if truth be known, but the light coming from the television is hitting it at just the right angle to cast a huge shadow, it seems immense!! Turning the main light on reveals the Devil’s own arachnid in glorious technicolor ugliness!! It sits motionless in the light, like it won’t be noticed. As If! The only thing that can happen to make things worse now is if it scurries off under the sofa and gets lost. I pray It’s not going to happen today though!
Several wallops later and calm is restored. Sarah’s still laughing at my amazing floor to ceiling leap, but I breathe and let out a small giggle too. I sprawl on the sofa from now on, it’s much safer there.