I'm scared. I'm scared that I'm gonna be alone.

Lately I've been feeling like I'm slowly going insane. I can't seem to focus on anything, and I can't find peace in anything. I feel tired and un motivated to do anything. The people I talk to seem to always walk away. I feel like no one cares at all. I'm not the type to just ignore them, I'm the type to always try and fix things. But lately I feel like no one really gives a ****.

People get busy, I know. But somehow, I always find time to communicate or reach out to the people I love, even if I'm busy. I've never had someone do the same for me. Cold replies, even been ignored or replaced. How many times do I have to be knocked onto my feet and get back up (metaphorically)?

Someone once told me, "you have to start enjoying your company before others can enjoy yours". I enjoy my company, I love myself. But why is it so hard to be accepted by others? Why is it so hard for someone to just reciprocate the effort I put in to care. I put on a fake smile and go out everyday.

I'm scared. No one to talk to. 22 years old and feeling this way. Oh boy.
avehrp avehrp
22-25, M
Aug 22, 2014