I Want To Believe In God

I have always searched but never really felt gods presence. I want so badly to be in touch with god but I feel like there is some sort of barrier between me and finding out.

How can I find god? As this is my first post on EP I think I an do a little better than what I wrote above so I will elaborate. I have always been open to the idea of god with no particular religion in mind for most of my life. Until a few years back I suffered with allsorts of mental health issues that have now been resolved. However with that resolve came an over whelming feeling that there was no god and how foolish people are to believe there is a god. I began to loathe religious people and religions I would attack them at any turn. I was bitter, I realise now, not at the people I was venting at, but at myself and at the god who I now knew wasn't there. A year ago I some how ended up reading the bible and the Koran and other religious books and I realised that it was I who has been foolish. I knew very little about these things I was slating. And although parts of 'god' seemed to open up to me. I still do not feel the overwhelming presence that I know so many do. I hope in time I can come to a conclusion on god and hope without a doubt that god in whatever form, exists.
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May 9, 2012