I Am Separated, Soon to Divorce
Every time I think I am doing fine riding my bike along the the healing trail of separation, taking a breath of relief from all the up hill struggles and emotional pain. Something happens to knock me clean off the beaten path!!!
As I start to appreciate the cool breeze brushing against my sadden face, and actually notice that there is a ray of sunlight peeping through the dark and cloudy skies ahead, a giant boulder comes crashing down without any warning, and knocks me straight off my bike and into a huge puddle of mud and gravel!!!!
As I sit there assessing another bleeding wound to add to my collection, I look at my bike and know, that the only thing I can do is just stand up, shake all the mud off me, and jump back on.
The frustrating, and difficult part is, I know that there is nothing or no one that can help me on this journey but me!
I know, that in order for me to get to the sun filled valley of peace and harmony at the top of this never ending mountain of pain and struggle, that there will be obstacles that come my way, some will be small and some will be huge, and every time this occurs the amount of damage or wounds I sustain will be less and less.
What gets me is...that even though my path is so difficult and exhausting, my ex seems to have adjusted so easily!
It's like he is flourishing in the garden of single life with out a care in the world. He is enjoying the scents of all the different flowers at his disposal.
Not once, does the thought even cross his mind of the radiating flower that he once picked from this garden and placed in a pot on a shelf in his life. He promised to nurture and take care of this flower and instead he left it on the shelf to slowly wither away!!!
The sad thing is that the shelf the wilting flower is sitting on faces the garden that he is basking in, and painfully watches him running free without a care in the world, picking a bouquet of flowers to his heart's content, while she sits there rooted in a cracked old pot in a dark gloomy room!!!!
As I start to appreciate the cool breeze brushing against my sadden face, and actually notice that there is a ray of sunlight peeping through the dark and cloudy skies ahead, a giant boulder comes crashing down without any warning, and knocks me straight off my bike and into a huge puddle of mud and gravel!!!!
As I sit there assessing another bleeding wound to add to my collection, I look at my bike and know, that the only thing I can do is just stand up, shake all the mud off me, and jump back on.
The frustrating, and difficult part is, I know that there is nothing or no one that can help me on this journey but me!
I know, that in order for me to get to the sun filled valley of peace and harmony at the top of this never ending mountain of pain and struggle, that there will be obstacles that come my way, some will be small and some will be huge, and every time this occurs the amount of damage or wounds I sustain will be less and less.
What gets me is...that even though my path is so difficult and exhausting, my ex seems to have adjusted so easily!
It's like he is flourishing in the garden of single life with out a care in the world. He is enjoying the scents of all the different flowers at his disposal.
Not once, does the thought even cross his mind of the radiating flower that he once picked from this garden and placed in a pot on a shelf in his life. He promised to nurture and take care of this flower and instead he left it on the shelf to slowly wither away!!!
The sad thing is that the shelf the wilting flower is sitting on faces the garden that he is basking in, and painfully watches him running free without a care in the world, picking a bouquet of flowers to his heart's content, while she sits there rooted in a cracked old pot in a dark gloomy room!!!!