Why Am I In The Middle?

I started getting curious about girls when I was about 13. I kissed a few, just messed around. Then when I was 15 I started a relationship with a girl at school that lasted a year and a half. It was hard, there was a lot of homophobia. But we got on with i and I fell for her hard.
We broke up after I moved country and we stopped talking for a while (her new girlfriend hated me). After we broke up I lost it a bit and decided that I never wanted to be with another girl. So I started seeing guys, which is fine because I never really stopped be attracted to guys. But time and time again, I was let down. I can't trust men and I can't ever see myself having a relationship with a man.
Then Nikki came along. She really cares about me and I care about her. We get on so well and I'd love to be with her. But I can't help but think that I should be with a man. I also have feelings for my ex girlfriend, who has just came back into my life. I feel so confused. I'm attracted to men sexually and yet I want to have a relationship with a woman. My ex says I'm bisexual but I totally resent that. I just want to be one or the other. Straight or gay, I don't mind: I just hate being caught in the middle.

MissMuffin MissMuffin
18-21
Jul 19, 2010