I Get Very Irritated

My wife and I are nudists.....which means we enjoy the freedom and comfort of not wearing clothes when it is possible and practical. It DOES NOT mean that we are into swinging, **********, foursomes, group sex. Nor does it mean we are looking to "hook up" for an affair, share naked pics (for sexual purposes), or whatever. We are just an average couple who is in love with one another, faithful to one another, and live our lives like many 'conservative' people would. Yes we have an open mind, we enjoy being naked, and we enjoy sharing that experience with others of a like-mind.....but we have do not have nor have ever had any intention of sharing anthing more. I just irritates me that our chosen way of life attracts so many people who think that since we like to have our clothes off we are also voyuers, exhibitonists, swingers, into kinky sex, etc., etc. It irritates me that people can be so narrow-minded that they think "nudity=sex". We love sex.....but with each other. Our sex life is private between us, and we share what we wish at our our discretion.

IndyJoe IndyJoe
41-45, M
18 Responses Feb 13, 2009

IndyJoe, I'm a nudist too. I live in Fl near 5 different resorts. My firm beleif is that the Victorian principals that this country has about nudity and sex is really a detriment. Just look at other countries where nudity in the proper setting is: no big deal. Their crime rates are nothing compared to ours. However for anything to change ti will take parents to make no big deal out of nudity at home ! JMHO

Hangups about our bodies are very difficult to overcome, especially when we are constantly bombarded by shallow ideals and expectations of what we "should" look like. Scars from ridicule, judgements, and insults can run deep and remain sensitive. You said you used to be a dancer....I dont know what may have taken place or happened to you over time to make you so body shy, but I am here to tell you that it CAN be overcome, and you CAN once again enjoy body freedom. Its sort of cliche, but let me say that if I can do it....anyone can. Hang in there and keep trying. A whole new world and way of life can open up for you if you want it to and allow it.

Bless, I went to a Day Spa with my girlfriend a few months it was a nudeWomens Spa. Lets just say I was the only one with a towel on and the big joke my friends said you used to be a dancer 10yrs ago. lol x

I do and completely understand that it is not because you want to be a swinger people who assume can be infuriorating

It makes alot of sense. The lifestyle isnt suited for everyone's tastes and there is nothing wrong with that. If you enjoy being naked once in awhile and havent decided about it yet....there's nothing wrong with that either. Im happy that you are one of the "non-nudists" who accepts us for who we are (and maybe join us once in a while too?).

I know i goof around alot and get the whole redhead stigma . Plus i am someone who doesn't think twice about the nudist life even though i do on occasion enjoy enjoy being nakie and am undecided . I hope this makes sense

Hiya there red!!!! Its good to hear from you!! Its commonplace, I think all nudists encounter this problem. You want to see how common it is? Just google "nudist" and see how many **** and swinger sites come up. Even here on EP....Alot of the stories from people who write about being 'nudists' ( and also 'naturists') and their experiences are usually of a highly sexual nature. Its a struggle that we have to face and hopefully overcome.

You and Pic are two of my favorite people . I am sorry people are assuming things like this about you . Hugs

Actually nothing could be farther from the truth when you are with true nudists. Nobody cares that your body may not be perfect, and nobody will stare or judge you. It is natural to be nervous, apprehensive, and even in some cases "mortified" when one is not accustomed to being nude (especially around other people). Both I and my wife have life-long body issues, self consciousness, and a lack of body image confidence. The truth is we are not always feeling as comfortable as we could be....especially in new situations and around new people. But we have both discovered that it only takes a few moments for those fears and anxieties to subside. I can tell you this over and over again, and you may never believe it...but it is true and the only way to prove it is to experience it for yourself. Most people who are introduced to the idea and philosophy of nudism immediately begin to think the worst...."I dont look good enough, people will be staring at all of my flaws and imperfections, and so on", but that is not the case at all. Im not trying to talk you into it, Im just sharing some insight from my own personal experience(s). Believe me....YOU are your own worst critic, and others dont see you the same way you see yourself.

Bless, Well if your comfortable enough with eachother to be naked and to do so around other then. Crack on. I would be mortified and I know others would be like put your clothes back on. lol x

It happens....but not because nudity automatically leads to sex. It is because we have been conditioned to think that it does, and so it is often seen as an invitation. There are times when my wife is naked that I cant seem to keep my hands off of her, but most of the time when I see her and she is naked....I still see her as I would if she were fully clothed....as a person who I happen to be married to. I have never seen any other woman naked and had any desire to have sex with her (under ordinary circumstances that is). Some would say that I have been "desensitized", but its just that I dont look at people any different when they are naked than when they are fully clothed. That is what is at the heart of true nudism/naturism.

i agree with everything you touched on but i once had a bf that every time i took off some clothing, he thought that meant it's time to have sex. once i took off my top because i was hot and wanted to cool off and the next thing i knew, he was all over me. i didn't want to have sex, i just wanted to cool off!

I remember that letter, infact I clipped it and put in my "nudist scrapbook". Yes, family bathing in public bathouses is common practice in Japan. Among primitive tribes partial to total nudity is a way of life (and in both cases the children are in no way scarred for life or traumatized in any way....but the "experts" dont seem to mention or explain that fact). Studies have shown that cultures and countries where nudity is more accepted and commonplace have lower sex related crime rates than the United States. Yet....We (Americans) tend to hold onto our myths and beliefs about it. It baffles the mind. In fact we have a huge tendency to sexualize nudity in any form....I guess that helps to reenforce our stigmas about it. Alot of people say that "nudity doesnt equal sex, but nudity LEADS to sex". Oh really? Does a person automatically get "horny" when taking a bath, changing clothes, going to the doctor? Does a couple automatically desire to "jump" their mate EVERY TIME they see each other naked? The answer is no. If this theory held any weight, then we wouldnt even be able to bathe our young children or aging ailing parents, let alone anything else. I am just convinced that people dont understand because they dont WANT to understand (it goes against what they are accustomed to).

that made me think of something i once read in "dear abby". there was a girl from an asian country here in america as a foreign exchange student and the family that was hosting her had a hot tub. one evening, everyone got into the tub and when the girl came to join them, she was naked. the family was taken aback by her nudity and told her she needed to put on a bathing suit or something. she told them that there wasn't anything sexual about bathing, in her country bathing with others and everyone is nude doesn't mean it's a prelude to sex. so youre right about different cultures having different views on this.

It isnt natural for that to be the first thing one thinks about. Many cultures where nudity is more common and accepted do not have this problem....they can be alot more open about sexuality too, but they seem to keep avaerage nudity and sexuality in their proper perspective. Our "nudity=sex" mentality is actually contrived from religious belief that sex is the "original sin", and that since Adam and Eve were naked....became ashamed of it....and God made clothes to cover them up; then being naked must be just as sinful as having sex. It is also perpetuated by the "experts" who say that nudity scars people (especially children).

i guess any time you're naked, sex is the first thing that comes to mind. and not just sex but the kinds of lifestyles you mentioned in the story.

Yes it is unfortunate. We nudists are trying to build a little understanding and acceptance from society, trying to "clean up our image" so that people know we are no threat to anyone. However it is just the very people I spoke of who insist on calling themselves 'nudists' or 'naturists' that perpetuate the general public's beliefs and opinions about us, which makes it very difficult for us to be taken seriously.

unfortunately, that's what most people would think about nudists.