What Is Happening Here...

Hello everyone...my name is Tanya Nelson and I am a recovering alcoholic and I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and I am being treated for depression/ anxiety and I am gettin chubby cheeky I am am 37 years old and I am not sure where life is heading for me. By no means am I suicidal but I have a little anxiety going on right now. I am graduating from college and my folks are coming to South Dakota and I can't have them stay at my house cuz i am poor and I don't even have a shower...I have to shower at the local Wellness Center and while I am there I exercise my chubby self so that I can appreciate my naked self in the mirror. I don't even have a man to really get thin and hot for so I do it for myself...

My doctors tell me to exercise cuz that will help my joints but my joints hurt and they tell me to keep exercising. I do it and actually sometimes I like it but somedays like today I am angry.

I am in recovery from alcoholism and this hasn't really bothered me until lately and I know that I should go to a meeting but since I haven't been to a meeting I have gotten farther in life than if I had gone to my AA meetings. The meetings can be helpful but if you go to a bad one it kind of sucks.

Today i am in a mind of disarray and wish that I had a little more money.

I guess I am frustrated.

UPDATE! July 14,2010
Ok, so I am still sick and tired of being sick and tired but my visit with my family went well. I am still a little chunky but I had a period of three weeks where I worked out  and it FELT SO GOOOOOOOODAAAA!!!!!!!!! And I saw some hotties at the Wellness Center.
BUT what I really wanted to share was the fact that I worked thru that day and I didn't drink. I still continue to take my meds and realize that those days are going to come and go. As Winston Churchill said, "If you are going through hell.................keep going."

tanyasd tanyasd
36-40, F
1 Response Jun 3, 2010

I admired you and looks like you are handling pretty well.I am sad and sorry for not having a shower.Keep your spirits high.