Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda, Didn't.

That's what I say to people who tell me 'you should have'. I take great pleasure in reminding people that tell me 'shoulds' and 'musts' that I am a human and so are they. It is best to remind such people that they are dwelling on the past. It is not something that can be changed now. Nor might you even remember that you 'should' do as such in the future. It is not something you or they have control over and so they are wasting their energy and being disrespectful attempting to tell you off or something. Yes you can endeavor to 'do the right thing' more often, but it is impossible to expect one to do the perfect thing every time on cue. Even people that have been practicing something for years screw it up sometimes. To get something right the first time at the perfect moment? Inconcievable! I would not even expect somebody to get something right on the tenth time. I would expect them to try and so a gradual increase in the frequency of getting things 'right' to a high level may occur, but I do not expect it. So people that try to expect that of me are promptly shut down and ridiculed. If they are persistent I take steps to remind them of their own imperfection. If someone is b*tching at you just turn them into a hypocrite and make snipes at them. Often simple to do when you actually look for their mistakes.
Explodey Explodey
22-25, M
2 Responses Feb 24, 2012

Live Life
I believe in fate, the supposed force, principle, or power that predetermines events. I live
my life with the understanding that I have no control over the events or outcome of my final destiny and with the assurance that everything will be alright in the end. I have full and complete trust in fate. I find that I tend to live life fearlessly because of this belief. I have no use for the words, could’ve, would’ve, or should’ve in my vocabulary. Those words lack any true meaning nor hold any real value to me. I live my life the best as I know how and it unfolds as I go. Since fate controls my destiny, there’s nothing that I can do to change it; I can only embrace it.
When I was twenty-one years old, I married my best friend. I met Jack when I was fourteen. We were inseparable for twenty years; we grew up together, and we shared everything. As a couple, we were truly bonded. There was one thing that we didn’t share and that was his chronic disease; Diabetes. It was something he had to deal with every day. Eventually it became something I had to deal with also, as the long-term health risks and side effects from Diabetes are serious and sometimes life threatening. After the birth of our two daughters, life began to change. Jack’s health took a turn for the worse. He suffered a heart attack at the age of thirty-four, subsequently requiring double bypass open-heart surgery. He also suffered from retinopathy, a disease of the retina, which resulted in multiple laser surgeries leaving him with limited vision in one eye. To make matters worse he was diagnosed with an extreme case of depression. His health continued to go in a downward spiral. By the time our daughters were ages five and ten,their father, my husband, my best friend was gone. Jack passed away at the age of thirty-six from complications of Diabetes. I believe this was Jack’s fate as well as mine, for him to live a short and brief life and for me to have to raise our daughters without him. I’m okay with what has happened. I have no regrets nor do I harbor any feelings of guilt. I don’t regret any decisions I have ever made. If I did, I would be stuck in a constant unproductive and depressed state of mind.
Even though I miss him dearly, his laugh, his sense of humor, his company, his friendship, I know whatever happens or has happened is for a reason, and there isn’t anything in this world that could change it. I have the assurance of knowing no matter what happens it was meant to be. It is my destiny. It is my fate.

Your post reminded me of this essay I had written for school. So I posted it. "Live Life".

I agree with you on this, thanks for writing.