People Just Dont Understand Me

I have depression and axiety and I have been on Zoloft for about 4 months and I was venting to someone about how I was feeling (i asked my dr to up my dose from 25mg to 50) and he says "why the f*** are you crying? you dont need meds. you just need to suck it up and get over it. thats life." I got so mad at him because i felt as if he wasnt trying to get to know me or understand why I feel the way I do and he wont try to understand that the Zoloft is helping me. He and everyone else just seem to think Im making it up or that I am doing this for attention. I have been like this for a while now and I didnt get help until I turned 24. No one really knows how I feel so for someone to tell me that I am fine and there isnt anything wrong and I know something is wrong and I am getting the help I need. I feel as if people think Im doing this for attention and Im not. The Zoloft has helped me but some people are just so closed minded and they wont try to understand whats going on with me. (shrugs) I guess not everyone is so willing to understand or try to understand whats going on with me. maybe I dont need him and everyone else in my life who arent willing to be there for me as much as I have been there for them. I just wish that wasnt the case because I still would like to feel as if I have people on my side that I can turn to but in all reality thats not always the case....
Sb88 Sb88
26-30, F
1 Response May 18, 2012

I completely understand. I knew from the time I was a child that there was something different and wrong, not exactly wrong, but I knew I was very depressed and it wasn't just depression, but trying to get help was very hard for me. I would go see drs and even clinics that supposedly were able to help to only be told that I was just going through a phase and it was just depression and I would grow out of it. I was on many anti-depressants for many years until I was in my mid 20 ' s and found a psychologist who actually listened to me and I was diagnosed with bipolar and depression. I've been seeing this person for about 7-8 years and I have had to change my meds a few times, mainly I think my body gets use to some meds and they end up not working anymore. It took me as a young child to like I said in my mid 20 's to find the right person to be able to talk to. Some would think after going so long , you ought to be fixed, but some people will never understand things like depression or a mental issue like being bipolar. It doesn't go away and you can't just snap out of it or just toughen up. It's been a long hard journey for me even with help and many situations that I am facing today and have been for many years takes a toll on a person. I just turned 34 yesterday and have been dealing with a not so great relationship with my husband, I had lost my job last year due to being in pain and then a month later found out I had a huge fibroid tumor growing, had surgery to remove it and have been in pain ever since. My Dr that did the surgery acted like it was no big deal when I kept going back to them month after month to tell them I was still in pain and then they ended up moving away. I have no insurance, I had to move back in with my parents in order to get help because I wasn't getting any living with my husband and that's just another part that depresses me. A man told me of all his hopes and dreams for us, but since I graduated from college and had no luck getting the big money making job he expected, things in our relationship have gone down hill and now I'm fighting for help from disability because my pain has just worsened throughout the year and a half since my surgery and now I have to travel an he and a half away to see a dr because no one seems to want to touch or examine me in my hometown. All they have done is drug me up when I go in to get help and the drugs don't help at all, I even tell them that there is no use in giving me drugs, I wasn't there for that. I just want to know what is causing my extreme pain and if it can be fixed. Sorry for getting off subject, but I do understand when people and drs act like it's no big deal. My issues have been more about the meds not working and them having to switch them a lot. I want to end up one day to where I can be able to control my mental health issues without meds, but I already know that it is a hard process if it is possible. For some it is and others just don't produce enough of certain things that some meds have in order to make them feel better. If you find a medication that you know is working for you and your Dr is refusing to give it to you, then it might be time to find another dr. You know more of what is working for you than anyone else can tell, so I would stay on the medication that works for you and then find things that interest you and do them. I know some people get or have extremely busy lives, but we all need to take a tad bit of time out for ourselves or we will eventually slowly loose what it is like to be our true self. I know this because one of my down falls is putting everyone else's needs before mine and it is not healthy. Even if it is for a short time or just once a week, find something that you love to do and do it. Even if it's a hobby and it takes longer than expected to finish a project, take your time, it will make you feel better that not only you did it, but you accomplished it too. I hope you can find someone who will listen to you and really help you either stay on the medication that works or find you one that will. Take care!