No Boyfriend Since Birth

I have no Boyfriend since i was born. But I have crushes on boys too. I know how it feels to be single. It's lonely during Valentines Day, I'm envious with other couples holding hands together, talking intimately, cuddling..But you know why I'm still single until now that I'm 21? Because I was really serious with my studies and I think having boyfriend could destruct me in my studies. I also have no time for befriending guys and socialize in parties. Furthermore, I was afraid of unprepared pregnancies, I'm afraid of being hurt in a relationship, I was afraid that my boyfriend would cheat on me and I end up self pity. I could describe myself as a pretty, smart and understanding girl. But I think no one really likes me. Whenever I have a crush on someone and if he knows it, I think, he's keeping himself distant to me. All of the boys I like doesn't like me. Moreover, I have a cleft palate. It's not really that severe because I can still speak clearly although there's a little hypernasality on my voice. I'm afraid I would be ending up an old maid.
zazzily zazzily
18-21, F
8 Responses Jun 3, 2012

Don't worry. I hate Valentines day, and really has not REAL valuable meaning to it. Also, it's okay to be single. I was single for a long time before I actually started dating anyone-for the reasons of, not wanting to get hurt, betrayed, experience the feeling of heartbreak, ext. I stayed in that state of mind for a long time. "Boys are stupid, I'd rather be single."
My first serious, SERIOUS boyfriend ended up leaving me in the dark and broke up with me blindly, and it is devastating to experience something as such. It took nearly a year for me to start opening up again, but when I did, it was a great experience and I met the love of my life.

What I'm trying to say is, being single can suck, and relationships themselves can also suck, but when you find that person that makes you feel alive and pure, you'll know. :)

ah dont trip - valentines day is just another day of the year - couples talk intimately and the hold hands and cuddle every day of the year - what is so special about valentines day? what can you do on valentines day that you cant do any other time of the year - you know - so just take it easy and enjoy life - thats what its all about

I'm used to it:) anyway thanks..

you're welcome - good luck and keep your head up

I was like you when I was in school. I am 22 right now, and I stayed single until after I graduated from High School. I already had trouble focusing in class, and didn't want to have a Girlfriend to make it even harder to focus. I was also more reserved back then. I wasn't able to show my feelings like I should have. I let a wonderful girl slip away, and now we don't even talk anymore. I am sure that you will find the right guy for you. Just remember to always be yourself, and don't let anything get you down. You are wonderful as you are. If you have to change to be with someone, then that someone doesn't deserve you.

Thanks for that wonderful advice:) Yeah, I believe that the right guy has not yet to come. Love can wait:)

hey dont think that way sometimes people are so afraid to come when they know that the woman is so smart and so bright not because of physical outlook but because men are easily intimidated by scholarly and bright woman considering your background im sure you are so bright and all.Dont feel bad later on when you are in medical school alot of people you will met across and i guess you will find that your cleft lip is not a hindrance and im sure you will have a boyfriend then.

thanks for that wonderful advise! actually I have a cleft palate not a cleft lip:D,

oh im sorry i see your photo and i think you look normal so nothing to be ashame on that and because you are more intelligent men feel embarrass to approach you in every way so i guess much better to put it in normal level and im sure men like me always appreciates women with intelligent and beauty lies to the beholder so i guess when the right one hit you im sure you will have all the love you want and all the feelings of being love too.LOL

I totally admire you for waiting and I know that one day you'll meet a totally nice day who deserves you and treats you right! Cheesy but, hope it's true! X


duude! i know how u feel, i feel like that all the time, In HS i didnt really care if i had a bf cuz school was my 1st thing in my mind, yea i would look at guys and envy girls with bfs. I would hate seeing couples at my school, Now thats im 20yrs do i want a bf? hell yea.. but sometimes i think that no guy would like me cuz of my insecurities and never being an a relationship. I dont believe in love but i guess ima have to wait. U have to be patient i bet when u dont expect it ull catch a guys eye! :) good luck!

Thanks for that advice:) Yeah, love can wait:D

Whys everything in the world have to be competitive and aggressive? Take your time with it, know your own limits of time, because in reality all it boils down to is time. If you could manage studying medicine and having a personal love life without feeling overwhelmed, you just got what a life with love is. Lol and for searching of love, just get friends. Choose the ones that have the best quality in your eyes, and eventually the friendship can become more. Don't let your negative sides control and speak for you as a whole. People will like you, they just need time to get used to you, by being friends or just talking once in a while. The ones to like you instantly will most likely give up on you the quickest.

Thanks for that wonderful advise:) I'll try it:)

I dont want to be rude but thats alot of fear. who dares win, its that simple be little more aggressive. seriously, I think you have a lot of good quality, just keep searching and you find someone who love you back.. X)