Why in blazes am i still single? Why have i been single for the past 2 years? I ask this question of myself all the time and it really irks me that i can't come up with a conclusive answer. Am i ugly? Perhaps i'm not funny enough? Maybe I'm too smart... or not smart enough. All these different possibilities exist, and i can't really pin down on any one thing what it might be.

I'm not a handsome man, but i also know that I'm not bottom of the barrel either. I consider myself to be around average. I'm 5'10" with a medium build. I got a bit of fat... yeah, but not copious amounts of it. Hell, i weigh about 200 lbs. I'm well proportioned i think... head's not too big, shouldn't not too wide, belly isn't covering my toes. I got short hair, dirty blonde, a mustache i've had and cared for since i was 14 (when it was still peachfuzz). So all in all, i'm probably of average to slightly above/below average attractive in the physical sense. So i don't think it has to do with that.

I'm a considerate person, and quite kind. This isn't just me saying it... everyone i know says it. I listen to people, male and female alike. I pay attention when they talk, not just about interesting things, but about the things i might not find as interesting... i give them the respect to hear them out anyway. I listen when it's most important too, when someone just has to finally let something out and need an outlet to do so. I live in the south, so i'm a yes ma'am no ma'am kind of person as well. I'm respectful.

I could go on with a list of my good traits, but before i make myself sound like the dream person i know i'm not, i have my bad qualities as well, and i achknolage them. I'm a heavy gamer, i spend a lot of my time on the computer, Introverted, and i'm a social outsider. (never developed any social skills when i was young... long story.) There's probably a fairly sizeable list of negative qualities that go with the positive.

But even taking those things into account, the pro's and the cons of each, i just don't understand why i can't find a girl, or garner the attention of one. It's like i'm invisible. Sure, they smile and nod and talk to me, but the "Friend Zone" is pretty much the only place i ever end up.

I look at some of these women online, who cite the qualities of men that they want. Kind, considerate, willing to snuggle, so on and so forth and i can't help but tilt my head and say "Bullcrap!" You women LIKE the idea of a man willing to do those things, to fit into that kind of glove... but the moment a man comes along who DOES, who enjoys sitting down and cuddling while watching a good movie, or just chatting the night away talking about whatever, you ladies just turn the other bloody way. Those are qualities that you like, qualities that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.... but they aren't REALLY the qualities that you want. (Keep in mind, this is a generalization. I'm citing examples that pretty much 90% of the women i've asked/read on this question have stated.) You love the CONCEPT of a guy having these qualities and the willingness to do these things, but it's not what you really want. Why? because that means he's a nice guy, and everyone knows that the nice guy finishes last. Why are there so many bad boys in the world? Because women don't WANT the good boys, the nice guys, the folks that are willing to put their woman on a pedastal like a queen, to treat her like she's the only woman in the world, and all others are nothing to her.

I DO THIS... i have always treated my girlfriends like they were queens. Hell, i turn my head during movies if there's nudity on them because i think the only female naked body i should see is MY WOMAN'S. Sex scenes are fast forwarded through. When a friend points out a cute girl, i look the other way. Why? Because i have eyes only for her that has given me the honor of allowing me to call her my own. But even with this... it's not enough. It's not enough that i am willing to do these things. It's not enough that i CAN fit a sizeable portion of the "Perfect Man" mold women put up that men should emulate. No... because i'm a nice guy. 'Nuff Said.
CoupDetat CoupDetat
36-40, M
1 Response Sep 20, 2012

the perfect woman for you might just be around the corner! you never know. and when you meet her you will understand why it never worked with anyone else! :-)

IF i meet her. I know she's not around the corner. There's no one here for me where i'm at. I already know this. The ones that aren't tramps or drug addicts are all taken -.- So... i gotta move. Just gotta decide where to move TO.