Im a single lady, been devorced for two years, and I am tired of going to bars, or night-clubs to find a date...let a lone a man...I just get drunk jerks. So I am going to church meetings, and different groups to possibly to meet a man. So far I like being able to go out and do things without telling anyone where I am going and when I will be back. I just hate sleeping alone, and miss the feeling of a man cuddling me, someone to cook a meal for, and eat together and talk about our day, then watch a movie or something.
blue62dragon blue62dragon
51-55, F
32 Responses Nov 18, 2012

I wish we lived nearby ...

That yes going to bars is not good place find a man. That good thing you is going to church and if pray about it God will help you find one. The other thing is hard being with love one and then being single of that you get where you miss things doing as couple.

I am with someone, whom is the light of my life. God has shown me a good christain man...he is a fantastic provider, and making me feel worthy....I love him dearly...and he has shown me more passion, more caring, more love than I have ever felt in two marriages. I feel like I can grow to a happier life I haven't felt in a life time. I asked God, prayed to our Lord, to have Him find me a christian man that is caring, loving, passionate, who doesn't drink to get drunk every minute of the day and night. My boyfriend all ways praises me as I do in him. Thank you God! In Jesus' name AMEN.

That God does answer preys if willing to wait to see what he will give you. I am glad that you found a loving man who is faithful and ope if Lord,s will that will work out for you for the long time.

The other thing is you need to give God thanks for answering this for you.

Now there's a good idea, after meeting the crap I met, the ones that say their Christian, holy ****, I think I would rather hook up with a f-n crocodile.

I agree...glade8er

I am glad you feel that God put right person in your life.

Divorced 4 years. I quit going to bars as well. Like you, I cherish my independence, but still would like some intimacy in life. People ask me all the time, if I'm dating. I say, No. They ask why not? I don't know. I've never believed in "The One" before, but now I find myself waiting for just the right guy. I quit putting myself out there. Ugh. I lost the thread of why I started to respond to your story. lol

Giggles...That comes with old age...giggles.

It's like I'm reading my own ****, if you throw in a couple, ok a lot of explisitries. Was I making a point?

Yeah, I agree to all of that from a mans point of view, I like people that are self reliant but still know what relationships are for

Thank you.

I would married you

That is so sweet, thank you 49ersfan35. Are you proposing? for real?

Hey, wondering what type of path to take myself. My wife recently left me so no idea to decide who I want to be... Also kinda worried about being alone (always been better in relationships) but damn dont know of I want to go through this pain again. Do feel I will need to go out though, just not sure if it will be to pick up women. Personally I would rather use a dating site (never have before and not thinking of doing it soon) than picking up a woman in a club or bar, but then thats maybe just me.

Its hard to say, I am just being myself, and if no one likes me, then it is their loss. Be happy, cheerful, kind, thoughtful, and caring, and if you go to church that is a great start. I am with you, about being better in a relationship. Dating sites, you have to pay for it, and still never know what you find. Just be careful.

You and me both. I have been divorced for about 10 years my ex fell in love some jerk on the internet. When went to live with this guy he turn her int a streetwalker.When the Judge ask her why she simply said I just married him get custody of my son.
I to miss cuddling next to someone and treating that someone like a LADY.

Goodness, I am sorry. I hope you find a true lady, like me.

Dont foeget about doing some Vol work at Red Cross or at your local Hosp.

I will check that out too.

I am looking for a good natured sweet heart of a gal to love and be loved by, Interested?
: )

Well, lets be friends and talk about it...(smiles)

I agree, I am really interested.
feel free to send me some email so we can chat in private.

I thought you might want to add me on this website and talk there.

Ok : ) thats great as well.

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Your Welcome ! Your on the right path!! Bless you!

I also was in a terrible relationship . We were almost married. Its true that others on the outside see what you can't when your blinded by love. Oftentimes lonliness takes us to dangerous places, you got out of an unhealthy relationship only to feel empty and lonely. I am also feeling that way but the flip side is that He can no longer abuse me. We both probably need to seek some type of counseling so we can feel whole without a man. Then we may find the right one. I have dated a few men but they havent been right for me. I have been celibut for a month and one of the fellows I had dated is trying very hard to win me back. I am not to be won unless he is the right person. I have made up my mind. I wish you the best Blue62dragon!! I understand! HUGS!!

Thank you SheenA65, I have been to counseling, and I have been celibut for 2 years. I just wont jump on a man, because he has a hard-on for me. It has to be real love, not just wanting to concur me, or have another mark on his bedpost. If I am going to be with any man, he has to be a Godly man, and God has to be the one to bring us together. I don't want to be needed, but wanted. And if God doesn't want me to be with another man at this time, or for the rest of my life, I am fine with that. As I can stay busy and not have to wonder, or do anything dangerously. Thanks again SHEENA65, thank you.

Yes blue62dragon, I understand how you feel. I have been seperated from my wife for a year and I am waiting for the divorce to be finalized. We were married for 40 years, but things and people change, the kids are all grown up and it was time to move on. I have been avoiding intimacy for a while, but now, more and more I am missing it. I spend much time on the beach. It's cold right now but beautiful. It's too cold to ride my bicycle, as winter in the Northeast is starting to settle in. I do have many male friends and I keep busy, but most of the women I know are married or too young, and the single women my age are too old. You are the peferct age for me! I'd love to perform blue69dragon with you *sighs*.

So I am not too old...and I love the beach. I ride my bike as well too. I don't have too many friends, female or male friends.

God, you're just hitting your prime. I So wish that our beach was one and the same. I'd love to get to know you better. Oh dear life is a beach being so far away from you....

50 is my prime? I don't think so..but ok. Yes, life is a beach the waves roll in and out...just like the people do.

You certainly arent old, my love. I hope I'll someday be rolling into your arms!

How old are you kbgloves1? my arms will welcome your touches.

I'm 62 - I'll be 63 in April.



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Thanks for your post . . . I have exactly the same feelings. It is so lonely climbing into an empty bed, but it sure feels good waking up without my ex in the morning! Here are a few things I have done that help:
1) Started a book club . . . lots of laughs and wine when we review books.
2) Hikes and walks with girlfriends
3) Get a cat or dog
4) Became a volunteer lighthouse docent. Learned a lot of history; meet people from all over the world; develop healthy friendships with men and women who share my interest.

Thank you carunner, I will look into that once I make the move to find out what clubs or groups there are, and if not, then start one in the neighborhood. I wish to get a cat, but I would have to pay a pet fee, and I don't have the money, yet for that, but once I get a job and I can afford such, then that is first on my list to get.

God bless you..I know

Thank you...God has...and He still will.

It is encouraging that someone is out on their own doing things the right way. You should be proud. And enjoy the time you have to yourself as well. And be patient, the right companion will come along for you.

Thank you tkski, those are delightful things to say to me. Thank much.

I'm only 22 and have never been married but I feel the same way sometimes. I love not telling people where I'm going (except the babysitters) but hate always sleeping alone. I like sleeping alone most nights though, people in my bed make my back hurt. Lol. What I hate, is the days when nothing is going on and I sit around all day by myself because I am working on getting my life together and my car decided to break down.

Darn that car breaking down...that bites.

Yeah, I finally got a job and it broke down. That's life though, I just keep on figuring it all out.

one step at a may feel like you are kicked back 10 feet, but keep can do anything you put your mind to.

Thank you

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Start a new Hobby!, you'd be surprised at how many genuine blokes you'll meet whilst indulging in you hobby! Do you like surfing by any chance? I would gladly teach you.

I have never been surfing, but now that I am moving to the beaches, I would love to learn.

The worst thing about being single is that feeling of missing a person to cuddle with, a person to share the good times and the bad....and the thought of having to set out as a single person trying to find someone is hard!

yes, it is the hardest part, going to bed, and no one is there. Cooking dinner, but no one to share it with. Come home from work and there isn't a sound in the whole house.

I am in a relationship, but there are times when it feels that I am not. Her mood changes daily. Distant one day, interested the next. She tells me she wants someone to love and support her, but then wants to have her freedom to do as she wishes and without having to answer to me........I trust her and know that there is no-one else involved....but there are times when I find the love between us so one-way. There is many a time when I have said to myself that I can't deal with it but on the other hand, I hate the thought of starting over again and feel that I need to give her time.........

I was in a 20 year marriage with a man, and it was a one way love. His love was booze. But he wouldn't stop drinking, I tried everything to please him, not once did I get anything in return. I new it wouldn't change, but I couldn't live like that any more...he was also verbally abusive and mentally abusive to me. I waited until all my kids became adults before I had my husband served with divorce papers. I have had enough. So, now I am starting a new adventure in my life.

I wish you luck in your new adventure blue62dragon and good to be friends with you ;-)

Thank you too for the friendship.

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I'm in the same situation. I used to meet guys in bars. Tried that a few times, never want to try it again. Then I started meeting guys in the gym. I'm considering throwing that option out of the window too! The only difference between bar guys is their limited consumption of alcohol, but their minds are on the same things.
I would consider going to church but I find it hard to find a church that matches my beliefs.
I find being single hard sometimes too. But what I have experienced shows me that being in a relationship is usually hard too. I want to be happy being single but I also want to 'get out there' and meet people. It's hard to find a balance between the two.

Wowzers...that is a find a balance anywhere. I have been told I should go back to school and I might other male singles in the class...I will try that too. never to old to learn new things.

Yeah perhaps if you do part-time studies in the evening. And you'll have something to talk about, homework!! Good luck.

Thank will be fun either way.

Good Luck. I hope you find him soon. I'm recently seperated and i'm dreading having to go through the dating scene again. Im not a church goer but i've considered it just to get myself out there and meet new people.

yes, it is a pain, to have to sell yourself to someone, to get them to like you, and hoping that you have a long lasting relationship.

I wish you all the best of luck...I have prayers.

What I like to believe is that if you find the right guy, you won't need to sell yourself to him, or get him to like you. If he makes you feel like you need to do that, I don't think he's the right kind of guy. He should like you for who you are, naturally.

Just keep smiling. He'll fall into your lap when you arent looking.

yes he sure will...that is what I plan on doing...getting my mind on something else and he will come

i know how you feel i have not been with a woman in 3 years or longer and it sucks big time.just someone to hold and to tell that its going to be alright or to have her do the same.just to hold hands while walking down the beach enuff getting loney

You are so right...those are the passionate moments.

hopefully you find someone soon :)

I have no doubt.

I am happy at this time of my life being single. But I do have a room mate...noooo, not one with benefits just a good trusting/trusted friend to help .. money-wise and playing cards with!

That is wonderful MorningBreeze

The transition from married to divorced to single is a tough one. I don't have much dating advice to offer, but know that I empathize with you and your situation. I didn't have cuddling, etc. when I was married, though...20 years later and I'm looking for it all over again. Hopefully, I will make better decisions the second time around.

Thank you JustPeaches, this time it will be marriage three...if I get married again.

Hope everything will be fine with you. You've had a good choice: Going to the church. Enjoy your life...... Best wish for you ;)♥

Thank you ngakim90 I have been attending church for 16 years. I love the church and what it does, plus I do a lot for my church too.

I know when the time is right you will find that "special someone". I wish you the best. I'm dealing with divorce now and I now that in time I too will find what my life was and is missing. Take Care.

Oh, gosh, I am sorry my dear, that sucks...God willing that I find a good man, and get married to have hours of passionate love.

I know what you mean, I am in the same situation. Been divorced for 9 months, but separated for 3 years. I do not want to hang out in bars, and I am an atheist, so church is out. I haven't been on a date yet, still sleeping alone. Working 70-80 hours most weeks, so I don't have time to feel lonely. But I can't do this forever. Hope you meet someone nice soon.

Thank you lostinmyownhome, wish you the best of luck too...I won't send you blessings, since you aren't a christian...giggles.

Although I am a Christian and deeply involved in my church, I have some other suggestions for you. Volunteer someplace; there you are sure to meet nice people. Join a bowling league; take a learning course somewhere; get involved in some cultural activities in your area; yes, even an online dating service (I know it works for some people); maybe join a gym. In all your activities, keep your eyes open, talk to people, get involved, keep your mind open. Good luck.

I have signed up for some activities that are for singles only. They are having a bike ride by the beaches, but I dont'move there until Dec 1.

I totally understand that....I miss having someone in my life..I live in Chicago which has so much to offer..but I find hard going anywhere these days..I want a woman to cook for and share the days events with...make plans to do things grow with..and in no way like the bar scene..and even large crowds are annoying at times...

Age: 56

I loved being married, I love having someone to come home too...I love cuddling and sleeping in his arms...but such as single life...I just go to work and come home and watch movies, and get on the net...giggles.

Nice to meet you Chuck (56) from Chicago.

love what u ha wrote n ur thoughts... can we connect i am carpenterjim65 on yahoo

i like early morning closeness....such a wonderful way to start the day....and yes the feeling of togetherness is so important in any relationship. Hope u find your right man soon.....

Thank you BigAsset, I would like nothing more then to fall asleep in his arms and find myself waking up in the same position...that is so romantic.

yes....actually sensuality and intimacy is as important (if not more) than just a sexual relationship. As for me i am very sensual.....need to feel the touch, smell, the warmth of bodies close together, smile, eye contact.....i love that..

Same here...nothing would please me gifts, but, the togetherness.