No One Is Sleeping In My Bed!

I think that's the way it's going to remain until I find someone who understands and cares about me enough to trust herself in my arms.  It's been a long journey for me, and sometimes very lonely.  But, you know, I'm still okay.  Really.  I think the time alone has given me the chance to learn to be comfortable with myself and who I am, and to know I'm going to be okay if no one's sleeping in my bed. 

It's far easier to be by myself than to be with the wrong person.  Been there, done that (a long time ago in distant lands), and I don't know if I could bear that situation again. 

I'm not exactly proactive in finding someone to share my bed with me, so if I ever wonder why I'm alone I know where to point the finger.  Some of my EP friends know bits and pieces about my romantic views and fumblings.  To me, it's like looking for a small clearing in the middle of a briar patch. Nothing worthwhile ever comes easy, does it? 

Then again, maybe I should be a bad boy and get it wrong a few times again (read "ignore my parent's well-meant advice")?  That way, I'll know better when I've got it right.  If it ever drives me that crazy that I'm sleeping alone there are things I can do, aren't there?  But am I really in that big a need?  I have my moments, otherwise I'm okay.
UnderEli UnderEli
46-50, M
Aug 3, 2010