December 7. When the Time is Right.

There are times when we simply do not know what to do, or where to go, next. Sometimes these periods are brief, sometimes lingering.

We can get through these times. We can rely on our program and the disciplines of recovery. We can cope by using our faith, other people, and our resources.

Accept uncertainty. We do not always have to know what to do or where to go next. We do not always have clear direction. Refusing to accept the inaction and limbo makes things worse.

It is okay to temporarily be without direction. Say, "I don't know," and be comfortable with that. We do not have to try to force wisdom, knowledge, or clarity when there is none.

While waiting for direction, we do not have to put our life on hold. Let go of anxiety and enjoy life. Relax. Do something fun. Enjoy the love and beauty in your life. Accomplish small tasks. They may have nothing to do with solving the problem, or finding direction, but this is what we can do in the interim.

Clarity will come. The next step will present itself. Indecision, inactivity, and lack of direction will not last forever.

Today, I will accept my circumstances even if I lack direction and insight. I will remember to do things that make myself and others feel good during those times. I will trust that clarity will come of its own accord.

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
zeeva70 zeeva70
41-45, F
1 Response Dec 7, 2014

Are you in this situation?

Doesn't matter. People read these thoughts of the day because it helps them, like they help me.

I am sorry I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. What is codependency?

You're apology has been accepted. There's lots of info on codependency available via google, if you're willing to learn. Books by Melody Beattie are also helpful. Here's a link to a website too.

I read some info on the Internet. I understand better. I can tell my sister and step father were in a codependent relationship. I also have a dear friend from a past work situation that I have enabled by bailing him out financially. I guess financially I tend to help friends. He still can't make a proper living. But I stopped bailing him out because I realized he wasn't going to get better that way. Now he's codependent with his landlord. He makes a subpar wage and doesn't pay his rent. And the landlord doesn't kick him out. This has been going on for nine years. I have moved but I am still good friends with him. I guess I can be an enabler sometimes. I am glad I meet you. Thanks for the education.

Not sure if the story with your friend(s) fits codependency (with him being the codependent) especially since he's not earning a living wage. Codependency has more to do with identity i.e. people pleasers or getting identity from others. There's plenty co-dependent high wage earners too. I don't know you it's possible you're codependent on him.

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