So Dang Alone.

So, moved to Ocala 6 months ago.  From a state I absolutely hated.  I did it for my daughter and grand daughter.  Daughter was date raped years ago, and now had a child.  Best kid in world.  Love her dearly.  She is 6 now.

Moved so daughter could follow a dream.  rides. 

Husband still back in other state.  Son there too, as he is in college.  He is blind.  Has sezures, but gets free tuition.  So he has to stay.  Hubby makes great money, but he is so mean to me, verbally.

Moved here 6 months ago, had to move now, twice.  Both Landlords are/were awful.  So am moving into a storage room.  Me, the baby, and daughter are going to stay in a 250 sq. ft. 1 bedroom camper.  We can't find something to rent, and even though family makes low 6 figures, can't get financing to get own house. 

They were here over summer.  I hate Husband.  he is good about giving me money, but, I pay so steep a price.  He is so verbally abuisve.  I haven't any friends.  People hate me.  On facebook, I swear I could put that I am going to kill myself, and no one would care.  Have very few people who even know who I am.    Son, can't wait to get home.  Not because of me, but because he likes his life there.  I am glad for that.....but I thought he was going to stay till end of next month.

Daughter, she is busy all the time, and when she is home, she is in front of TV.  I am not much really for this computer.  I make people hate me, but you know what?  REally I am just really really really lonely.  Was badly abused as a child.  I don't know how to be normal?  I don't know how to have friends.  My own family is so odd. 

I am just so lonely and alone.  And I hate it.
artistgus artistgus
46-50, F
Jul 16, 2010