hey guys I usually write in this page when things start getting bad again I guess I just rather write my feelings out than bleed them ( selfharming). It is getting worse and worse everyday I just wake up and go to school where either a. No one talks to me, my "friends" ignore me, they call me freak, go kill yourself or b. If I am with my "friends" they just keep quiet because they cannot tell me anything cause Im the weird looser. I just really want at least one friend I need someone wright now but everyone around me is soo full of ****. I dont want to cut my self again and I dont want to change who I am but I want my friends back I want to laugh again. No one really likes me anymore. I used to have a really good friend( we used to date) but he now has gotten more "popular" and I dont think he cares about me anymore. He just speaks to me when he has trouble at home or is feeling down because " I am the only one he can talk to, I am the only who cares, I`m diferent" but he doesnt even bother to ask me if I`m okay when I have tears running down my face. He can even admit he likes me anymore. At home everything is so weird my dad doesnt even care for me anymore he wont bother to pick me up or go to lunch with me, he says he rather watch tv. And my mom is sooooo ashamed of me last week we went to the doctor and she saw the scars on my legs so she asked my mom how did I got them, she was so ashamed that she liad telling her I had dropped a glass and accidently I got hurt. No one likes me, no one wants me. It feels so bad having depression and anxiety, but is is even worse when you are on your own in this. I want a friend so badly i want someone to love me and care about me.
CarolinaS1 CarolinaS1
18-21, F
1 Response Aug 15, 2014

Carolina, you don't want to change who you are but the thing you need to change the way you think, you want and want things that people have to wait time for. You should know that when you want you cannot wait for it, you need to get it and earn it. Go out and show people who you are and bring out your real inner self, let everything in your mind be displayed on the outside. We all want thing to be good and perfect in are life but you need to try to make gongs perfect to be perfect. "Don't compare yourself with anyone els in this world, if you do so, your insulting yourself."
There's time to make your life better and that time is not always going to be time so make the most of it before you try to bring back past time.