Why Me

Im so angry right. i found out almost a week ago that my husband cheated for the THIRD time in 3 years. the first time i ignored because we weren't even in love. we got married bc i was pregnant and since we were both in the Army we didn't want to be separated trying to raise a child. the second last year to a girl he worked with who was also married and had slept with most of the other guys he worked with. I found out through facebook on my own where she had started writing him nasty things that she wanted to do with him. I moved out for a little bit with some friends but eventually forgave him and we started over. He had apologized like he meant it but he wasn't overly emotional about it which i thought was normal since he isn't a huge emotional person. September 25th i left for a three month visit to my family whom me and my daughter havent seen in 2 years. last week my husband tells me that he cheated not even 2 weeks after i left with a 20 year old girl (we are both 26) in our house in our bed two times and now she says she is pregnant!!!!!!! He is sobbing the whole time saying its the hardest thing he has ever had to do and the worst thing he coul;d ever have done to me. His motto before me was deny deny deny and take it to the grave so i was shocked he actually came forward and told me. also apparently her mom encouraged her to keep the baby even knowing he is married. Im sorry but i think i could deal a little better if she would have aborted the child i know it sounds horrible but she knew he was married the whole time and he even spoke to me on the phone in front of her. I still love my husband and i feel so stupid. All he does is cry and apologize and tell me he realizes now he wants to grow old with me and can only see me being in his life. He never said stuff like this before and he never has cried like this before sometimes crying 2 or 3 times a day! its overwhelming since i feel like i dont feel anything right now and he is feeling so much since he knows he messed up so bad. i dont know why he did this though bc we had finally gotten to a great place in our marriage and we were so happy or so i thought. He says he is willing to do ANYTHING to get me back and prove he will never do it again which he didnt say after the second time he cheated. Do i believe him? Am i stupid for even considering this? has anyone been through a situation like this and it gone right? please help i need advice!!!! words of encouragement???????? advice???????
heavenslilangl14 heavenslilangl14
26-30, F
3 Responses Dec 1, 2012

get your dog neutered so you won't have any more bastard brats taking scant paternal resources from your son. after the vasectomy, say goodbye to this womanizer.

Sorry about all this! you are too young for this sh*t , make your plans to divorce....
he'll cry alot now, and what?- next year it will be 4, and at your 10th anniversary, 10....?
the other 'girl', the baby, all that sh*t , isn't your problem! sorry.......good luck!

Wow, that is a lot to swallow. I too hate my husband and actually wish he would cheat on me. It would make it so much easier for me to leave him. I have for two years had one leg out the front door but he keeps telling me sorry, sorry, sorry. I quit my career to stay home with our first born which was the biggest mistake of my life. I love being a mother but it has ruined me, took away my drive and depleted my self worth. You are very young to stay with such a disrespecting person. I will give it to you in this perspective..... You have a daughter whom I'm going to assume you would give your life for. If anyone were to harm her, you would pull out all stops to make sure that they paid in a small possibily disfiguring flesh wound. Now stating that..... your husbands behavior towards you is what your daughter is modeling for her own future. You must ask yourself, a person who is trained for combat "am I stronger than the emotional abuse that this man has tried to keep me in?" my husband is an emotional abuser. He is a sexually insecure, unemotional jackass that keeps me locked in do to me not working for 3.5 years. You are trained to be smart, strong and to persevere and you are way to young to remain in a relationship that doesn't lift you up and fulfill your needs. Good luck.

i am also a stay at home mom and have been that way for almost three years so i definitely feel alone. my daughter is 2 years old right now thats the only reason why i would even consider staying to give it a chance bc she wont remember but i feel i dont know how to move on and dont even know if i want to. I dont even think there are any good men out there that are still single.