Moving Forward (i Guess..!)

Hi, im separated and currently working towards a divorce im 34 years old and have a 3 year old doughter, i decided i wanted to separate because she had cheated on me in 2010, she asked me to forgive her and that it was an error in judgement, and asked me to forgive her, i tried to forgive her..but i just couldnt, she really tried to work things out, but she started to have a drinking problem because of our stressed relationship and, we slowly drifted apart, she started to go to AA mettings (which did help) and now she been sober for a year and a half she... our marriage was always rocky and i never though we would ever get a divorce, but in july 2012 she had told me she met someone else and that she started to have fellings for this person, so i decided to move out, and ever since ive been on my own, he curret relationship is rocky and she metioned to me couple of months back that she really did not love him she just missed the company and that she wanted to worl things out but like all good ideas it fizzled out and now its kinda weird cuz she still talks to me and wants to be my friend (for my doughters sake) but i just think she has a problem with letting me go and detaching her self from me, because she is really dependent on me, or she just wants the best of both worlds, i see my doughter on the weekd ends but i was soo attached to her that i feel empty.. i miss my doughter so much during the week..

and to answer you "HOW ARE THINGS NOW" QUESTION.. well shes ok my doughter is with her and her new partner, and it seems that with every day i become more and more depressed and lonly.. i just want to be left alone in bed and not wake up... ive had suicidal thoughts.. some days its less but that thought is always in my mind!! and belive me if it wasnt for my doughter i would have done it 6 months back!!

i just needed to lest some seteam out!!...
Texcatlipoca Texcatlipoca
31-35, M
Jan 18, 2013