He Is My World

Back in October 2004 i wasnt looking for anyone - possibly cuz i thort there was no one out there for me!! until my friend introduced me to him.  As soon as i saw him i knew i wanted to be with him....after a few meetings and texts we started going out.  The time together and the sex was fantastic but even after a month things started to go wrong.  He had taken another girl out to the cinema (which he says is because at the time i had so many male friends that he felt a bit insecure)....i found texts on his phone which suggested she wanted something but didnt get anything......

A year and a half went by and i found more texts on his phone to and from other women of a sexual nature tho nothing to suggest that anything other than texting had gone on.....my self confidence plummeted....tho i loved him so much i believed he would change.  during these months it was fantastic when i was with him tho always wondering what he was up to when we were apart!!!

this carried on until about a year ago and i stopped checking his phone as much and tried to put the past behind me....it has been hard and i ended up putting aside my life and got so wrapped up in his that now he has gone i feel left with nothing

when he was around me he showered me with love affection and gifts.....anyway we went on 2 holidays which were great, yeah there were arguments but i loved being near him.

he on the other hand has his love of football which i was increasingly jealous of and nagged him about - but its only cuz i wanted to be around him - probably due to to the fact he had made me so insecure

i found out i was pregnant in april this year and he said he would stand by me and move in with me.........but last month(june) he dropped a bombshell....he wasnt sure if he was still in love with me....i was devastated......i didnt go to work i cried and cried and a week later i lost the baby.  he came with me to the hospital but as much as i tried to win him back over he still cant make up his mind if he wants to have me or have the single life

im not coping very well and although its been nearly a month im struggling to cope...i dont want to go out and all i can think about is him....i have met up with him a few times just to be strong and confident to show him what i can be like but i dont think it has worked

my parents did not go on holiday due to my state and hate him and wont allow him back in the house even if he did want me

im now facing the fact of being on my own but feel like i dont want to carry on without him. i love him so much he is really sexy, affectionate,good looking and ambitious - everything i want in a guy.

i dont want to carry on with work - seeing friends doesnt interest me and inside i dont want to do anything but still around him...i feel so alone without him

womanwholovestoomuch womanwholovestoomuch
22-25, F
1 Response Jul 4, 2007

Just let him go; I know you can do it. You have to, and people are stronger than you think. ;p;, most likely the minute you let him go, he'll be back. At least that is how it works for me.