Even Typing This Evokes Feelings Of Embarrasmentok ill make another story here on ep .. im a strange cluster of personality disorders or so called (avpd,GAD,dpd,ect/al).. i joined this group because without any doubt im 'socially awkward' in my own eyes .. and in fact the 'awkwardness' well .. it came over time to dominte my life and endanger every possability of making and maintaining relationships with others.
as i titled it .. even as i sit here typing these words at the back of my mind is a lingering doubt of what a 'tool' im going to look like , spilling my emotional guts out online to a whole lot of people who i dont know and who dont know me and ofc .. i find it hard to imagine that anybody would care , for my selfish little story about my selfish way of life, .. being so selfishly pre-occupied with what other people will think of me or even if i will find some belonging anywhere in any group as i make efforts to avoid even being close to the people who are part of my life .
my social awkwardness follows me everywhere .. i used to escape it online .. but even in chats it effects me .. if other people are talking i dont like to interupt , or to feel asif i have interupted .. the flow of conversation in the chatroom.
Nicetoknowyou and peacebeyours,.
igomental 36-40, M 1 Response 1 Jul 28, 2012