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I Am Starting My Own Cult

Whatcha Say?

By: ShakespeareSonnet116
Written on February 3rd, 2013
Age: 31-35 , Female
371 people have read this story

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114 responses
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    Experienced321

    sister sonnet...ireland's mother theresa...lovely idea..as long as the tithing is tax deductable...

    Feb 5
    2 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      If that's the way you want to view it six, I won't stand in your way. So long as you give me all your money & do my bidding & stuff. :)

      Feb 5
      1 like
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      Experienced321

      as always dearest...I'm at your disposal...for better or worse...

      Feb 5
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Good show! :)

      Feb 5
      1 like
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      Experienced321

      my smock size is 2xl (room for growth...*wink, wink*)

      Feb 5
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Don't forget your complimentary magic Mormon underwear. :)

      Feb 5
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      Experienced321

      hmmm...would join the church if polygamy was part of the deal....lol

      Feb 5
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Never doubted that for a second. :)

      Feb 5
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    goodlittlegirl

    What are the accommodations like?
    Will there be organic food available?

    If I join can you buy me a Cardigan Corgi?
    Ive always wanted one *puppy dog eyes*

    Feb 5
    2 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Accommodation - basic.
      Food - you'll be growing it.

      I might be able to see my way to getting a Corgi. Maybe... There are lots of delightful little dogs at pounds & shelters looking for homes though. Who don't cost lots, & suffer considerably less breed related ailments. <<< just a thought. :)

      Feb 5
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      goodlittlegirl

      Forgive me Sonnet, you bring up a very good point. Why yes, a delightful pooch from the pound is a much better option. Kudos aspca here I come.

      Feb 5
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Actually! ...It is possible, at least here, to enquire with regard abandoned breed dogs. Is there an American Corgi appreciation society you could contact for example? :)

      Feb 5
      1 like
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    DEGBEME

    Okay wait a freaking minute here!! I have adored you for a long time now.......... and why are you taking my wallet?

    Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Safe keeping. There are no pockets in the smock.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    goliathtree

    I would like to propose a corporate merger between your cult and my cult. I think that you will find that the by-laws section of my cult's operation that covers bodily functions will fit well with your ideal. EP Link addition, since I have already supplied thumb cymbals, I shall require a controlling interest in the corporate structure. You may remain on as figurehead CEO and will receive stock options and a corner office with comfy chair and I will organize a work crew to move the altar to a sumptuous adjoining conference room. You may retain all rights for book publication and movie production, but I will require a small residual royalty.I will have my lawyer contact your lawyer *wink* http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burbot

    Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      You almost had with the promise of a comfy chair. But no. This cult is property of Sonnet Corp. all rights reserved.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      goliathtree

      I didn't say you had a choice. This is a very friendly hostile takeover. *smiles*

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      ^^^ mean :(

      Feb 4
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      goliathtree

      I am opening a Jamaican Subsidiary office....We can discuss "business" there.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      .<<< isn't talking to Goliath. *pouts*

      Feb 4
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      goliathtree

      Ok....Ok....You get your own corporate jet with a wet bar....I wasn't expecting you to be such a hold out.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      A true friend doesn't go stealing a persons cult though... *sniff*

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      goliathtree

      Ok Ok...I will simply be the silent partner that holds the books.

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      goliathtree

      You are good.....very good..... *bows down* *worships* I am still keeping the Jamaican subsidiary.

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Deal.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    Scarcollection

    Only when we get cool uniforms, do we get cool uniforms? :-D

    Feb 4
    2 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      floor-length sackcloth smocks are standard issue... Very breezy. You'll like it. :)

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      Scarcollection

      No way! I'm out... I want tight black uniform-dresses!

      I'm leaving the cult and starting my own, I call it the branch branch branch-Sonnet branch-Scarcollectionians. :-p

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      No. You're not leaving. <<< final word. :)

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      JaggedLittlePill

      She is quite the bossy cult leader.. usually people who try to leave the cult are tortured Sonnet....shall we send this one to the basement? ;-)

      Feb 4
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      DenteAvvelenato

      <=== dancing around in bedazzled and swaroski jewel encrusted sack cloth!

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      Scarcollection

      Yay! Torture! :-D Maybe I'm staying after all... but I'd lose the cloth, torture is best served nude and chained. :-p

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      That Dente one. Always finding loopholes...

      Yes, thanks Minxy. You deal with that though honey, please. My schedules full with being adored & the like... :)

      Feb 4
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      LackofabetterName

      do we need to wear capes? =D

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      JaggedLittlePill

      Lmao..uhhuh...I have goliath take care of it.....I am too busy encrusting my smock ...

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      .<<< needs to be scarier or something clearly.

      Feb 4
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      Scarcollection

      You could get a Sarlacc in the garden?

      Feb 4
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      DenteAvvelenato

      We wear snuggies backwards and pretend they are just unusually soft religious robes ... For special occasions we wear our nic capes http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/nicolas-cage-cape.jpg

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Yes. Fabulous idea! I could put the Sarlacc over there *points* between the rode bed & the swing set. Good thinking Scarcollection!

      Okay Dente, you're really starting to sell this to me now. :)

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      JoeyPFoxx

      Does the sack cloth show off my working man butt crack as I construct the altar?

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      goliathtree

      No..remember...we decided those are faults...not cracks.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      You want an assless smock, don't you? :/

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      JoeyPFoxx

      Why is it so breezy in here?

      Feb 4
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      DEGBEME

      I am not wearing a dress! ;-p

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      It a unisex smock DEG.

      Feb 4
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      DEGBEME

      Maybe so but I have bits that need to stay warm. ;-p

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Ya need to get some that magic Mormon underwear. ;)

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    EdieQuinnz

    who do we sacrifice in your name first?

    Feb 4
    2 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Ooooh. Choices, choices... However, considering current affairs I say we go with the hallucinogenic one who quite clearly licked her own back one too many times! ;)

      Feb 4
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      DenteAvvelenato

      Yikes ...

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Wha?

      Feb 4
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      DenteAvvelenato

      Licking ones own back side :-@

      Feb 4
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      Scarcollection

      Go-go Gadget tongue!

      Feb 4
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      EdieQuinnz

      =o

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      *double-grinZ*

      Feb 4
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      JoeyPFoxx

      And here I thought I was talented in being able to lick my eyebrows....

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      goliathtree
      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Anything you can do...

      Feb 4
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      JoeyPFoxx

      Do you require licking m'lady?

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      No thanks.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    DenteAvvelenato

    Does this cult require anything other than adoration of Ms. Sonnet?

    Feb 4
    3 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      I'd really like an nice cactus. But I believe Layne has that covered. So, no, not at present...

      Feb 4
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      DenteAvvelenato

      Well then I've been a member for awhile.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Smock? :)

      Feb 4
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      DenteAvvelenato

      Designer brand with jewels ...plus over my sack, I'm wearing a snuggie backwards and pretending it's a really soft religious robe...

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      *pouts*

      Feb 4
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    LackofabetterName

    You need a God in there? where should i pass my resume. =P

    Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Don't make me cast you out!

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      LackofabetterName

      Casting us out is the First step of being a God... >:DDD muahahahaha *evil forks*

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Stop that this instant!

      It my cult! MINE! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
      ^^^ tantrum.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      LackofabetterName

      there, there.......... *gives evil fork and cape* ='(

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      .<<< happy sonnet. :)

      Feb 4
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      LackofabetterName

      =D <<<<<< my expression after stealing all the koolaid.

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Splendid. :)

      Feb 4
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      LackofabetterName

      D: <<<<< I feel like i was cheated.....

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Bedazzle your smock. It seems to work wonders for the temperament. :)

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      No. Nu-uh. I'm good.

      Feb 4
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      LackofabetterName

      waaaahh! :''( <<<< throws tantrum

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Ep is juggling comments again. *tuts*

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      LackofabetterName

      *doesn't here anything* *Tantrums*

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Off to the basement with you then...

      Feb 4
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      LackofabetterName
      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Awkward.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      LackofabetterName

      wrong link sorry.... i was using a tablet soo.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NvJs3KNdkw

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      LackofabetterName

      LOL! at the first commercial.... @_@

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      ^^^ nothing a punch in the teeth wouldn't remedy.

      Feb 4
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      LackofabetterName

      Oh Dear. you know I would never hurt you. =p

      Feb 4
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    JoeyPFoxx

    Tongue slipping?

    Feb 4
    2 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Hush.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      JoeyPFoxx

      *wanders around innocently*

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Naughty.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      JoeyPFoxx

      MOI????? *shocked*

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    goliathtree

    *Passes out thumb cymbals*

    Feb 3
    3 likes
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      JaggedLittlePill

      I got tambourines....

      Feb 3
      1 like
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      goliathtree

      swing those hips baby!

      Feb 3
      1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      *sends you two off into the world to bring back of gullible... I MEAN... enlightened souls*

      Little slip of the tongue there. Never mind. ;)

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      JaggedLittlePill

      Lol...oh my ...guillibably(sp?) enlightend...right Sonnet?!!

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      I didn't say a word. Not a single word.... ;D

      Feb 4
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    awhitedot

    *strips naked and worships*


    Hmmmm...not much different form my everyday anyway!

    Feb 3
    3 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Such enthusiasm... Spiffy.

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    redmaple

    I have some friends who are good at calling rich widows to get the fundraising started.

    Feb 3
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Donation gratefully received. Y'know, for good works & all that malarky. :D

      Feb 4
      1 like
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      redmaple

      Usually by the time the sex with rich widows is over, the money part is forgotten.

      Feb 5
      1 like
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    goliathtree

    I mix a mean Kool-aide! And I am even better at blank stares.

    Feb 3
    2 likes
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Just the very type we're looking for. Right this way...

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    Sublimelovecuts

    yay something else to control my thoughts & live my life for me, where do i sign up?

    Feb 3
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      *hands you a contract* Never mind that pesky small print. I'll deal with all that. :)

      Feb 4
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      Sublimelovecuts

      I have to say just from reading your responses you seem somewhat articulate which is a welcome change for me. I like you now :D

      Feb 4
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      A good cult leader must be charismatic. ;)

      *hands you smock, magic underwear, & necessary bedazzling paraphernalia*

      Feb 4
      1 like
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    JoeyPFoxx

    *starts construction of altar*

    Feb 3
    1 like
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      Such a trooper! :D

      Feb 3
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      NEW!
      Spotlight outstanding comments to help more people see them, and to show your appreciation to the author.
      JoeyPFoxx

      I look good in fatigues. :)

      Feb 3
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      NEW!
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      ShakespeareSonnet116

      *hands you floor-length sackcloth smock*

      Feb 4
      1 like