Never Forgot You, Though You Forgot Me.

Alot of people will say we are crazy, for feeling this way. Maybe we are, but can it be helped what we feel? I had my first child-hood crush when I was 3 years old, he lived in the same flat as my Nan. I always would tease him annoy him ask him if we could be friends etc. We was closer when we was little but as we got a little older we drifted a-part. I always felt like this girl got in the way an I never liked her, and still don't. Iv'e seen her on Facebook and I think she is faker then fake. Anyway his mom used to baby-sit me and we used go to like the wacky and stuff. And from when we was about 3-5 we was a lot closer, we would chase each other and always be together most of the time. On sports day everyone else was at the far end of the field while we was at the top talking. Probably to adults It looked worrying but to me at the time, it was love.  he was more intelligent then me in a sense but I also had a old head on my shoulders being brought up with older siblings. However as time went by he didn't seem much interested in me anymore.  we was mostly separated for a lot of things. His Mom would still baby sit me and we'd just sit and watch TV program mes but we never really spoke. I would often say to him are you my friend or not, and he'd put his thumb up yes, thumb down no , and a maybe sign it was confusing. Anyway at around 7 he moved away to be with his Mom and her new partner he didn't move to far but it was far enough for us not to be in contact.  I can remember him giving me a hug outside the flat, and kissed my hand to say good-bye. Then he got in the car and he went.  

I saw him around a year later at a fate but we didn't speak much, though our moms did. And well that was it till I was 12 and I was offered to go in his house with my friend and her mom but i turned it down, I didn't want my feelings to come back for him, However when we drove past in the car, and I saw him with his friend.  It did and I couldn't stop thinking about it for a while. I always had it there in my mind through my teen years. When I got to 17 I found out a few of my friends knew him. But nothing come of it. I found him on Facebook added him but a few years later had to delete him because my then boyfriend insisted it. He knew I still had feelings for him. but my then boyfriend was abusive to me anyway. I sent him messages after messages, just to be friends with my crush again. He ignored them and a year later after I deleted him. He deleted my comments on his profile, He never spoke to me. And well that was that. I accepted time had moved on, things had changed. And that he just didn't want to keep in touch. I still go on his Facebook as its very public to see his pictures etc, But Iv'e accepted that my child hood crush will always be nothing more then a child-hood crush. And at only 20 years old now, what an experience to go through! 
Digoftheheart43 Digoftheheart43
May 25, 2012