Me Selfish?

I cant stand people calling me selfish without knowing how much I`m enduring alone just to save them from this crap.
When someone calls me selfish because of the tiniest thing I dont feel like doing for them(I`m depressed,I dont feel like doing anything people!) it just feels like a punch on my face.
Am I selfish? really? if you only knew what I`m doing for you,bottling inside all this pain so you wont have to see it.Keeping my tears away from your sight so you dont have to worry.
Taking pills when you cant see me, crawling out of bed when I just want to curl up and stay in the dark.Even smiling for you when I`m dying inside.
And I`m selfish?
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3 Responses Oct 24, 2012

People, like us, who are depressed are something that other people wouldn't understand. We try to do things in order not to complicate but its hard to keep things together, and more harder when you are trying your best out to put yourself together. They call us selfish because they really don't know.

Keeping a secret bottled up can be a heavy burden. And one of the useful social functions of this EP site is to give us a place to share things that we can't share elsewhere. I know I've done that with my stories, my comments, and even the questions.

You might just try looking after yourself by sharing something... maybe even try small, and see how it feels.

All the best naty!


my pleasure

why are you depressed? I have been depressed a long time and it's really starting to wear on me and my family. I've been depressed about the life that could have been mine a long time ago. I've been depressed about all the money I've lost for not being independent. Stuff like that. What are you depressed about?

what are you finding a lack of support for?

why do you have to keep it secret? I don't know why you would have to. Just need to find someone you can trust.

well, i am someone you can trust. If you need someone to tell your secret to, I can give you my e-mail addy. You have me a bit curious because you seem like you would have everything going for you, ya know?