My Third Time Again

Its been days that My ex Thomas cheated on me, and I couldn’t stop thinking about him, I still loved him, why did he did that to me, I thought we had something special, but he threw it all away, I talked to my good friend geno, and he told me everything of what Thomas did when he cheated, at first I felt disgusted but he wasnt the one who cheated, cuz the guy who he was with, made him do that, and Thomas couldn’t help it, but it was still bad that he did that, I didn’t know what to think, I remember I texted my friend and I told them how I was still in love with Thomas, but instead of sending that message to my friend, I accidently sent it to Thomas, and when he got it he asked me what was wrong, well I told him the truth on how I still love him, and he felt the same way and felt really bad for what he did to me, I know it was crazy to do this, but I got back together with Thomas, so me and Thomas were dating again, everything was going good now, its been a few weeks now, and I went to Thomas house one night, and we were watching a movie, but instead of watching the movie, we were making out, and I for some reason my hormones were going crazy and it made me do more then that, and after that me and Thomas had sex, and it was my first time, so I wasn’t a virgin anymore after that. Then after a while, Thomas wouldn’t talk to me anymore, I asked my good friend geno what was going on, but he told me that Thomas doesn’t want to be with me anymore. I couldn’t believe it but I went to ask Thomas about it, and it was true, he didn’t want to do this anymore, and he apologize for having sex with me, he said that was a mistake, and it didn’t matter to him, so I was crushed once again, why do I have bad luck with guys, so far I been with guys who are suicidal, dating someones ex , and now coming back with a cheater, whats next to come?
mayoral mayoral
18-21, M
1 Response May 15, 2012

My first time was strictly by impulse, and I ended up realizing that all he wanted was sex, and the scary thing is I still think about going back to him (hormones are something else aren't they?) even after knowing what I know. Other than him there are only like five other out-and-about gay guys in my school, and most of them have slept with the others, so relationships are tricky because nine times out of ten all the other wants is pleasure. The point of all this rambling is that you are not the only one who is struggling, so just keep on going and don't give up on finding love.