I Am Struggling With Religion
The older I get, the more stifling I find religion. I was raised in the church (United Methodist), but drifted away during my teenage and college years. I came back to faith in my mid-twenties when I met the woman who was to become my wife. For the next decade I was on fire for God.
I left a good job to work in multimedia at a contemporary church. I saw more conflict in this “ministry” position than I ever had in my secular career. I became jaded by church employment and was ultimately fired from my position for changing my membership to another church.
The church my wife and I joined at this time was an Independent Baptist Church. The pastors only taught from the King James Version of the Bible. All other versions were considered perversions. Rules were strict and many. Women were inferior to men, having an alcoholic drink was verboten, and questioning the pastor’s wisdom was very close to being an unforgivable sin. Taking medications for anxiety or depression was considered unnecessary. You only had to be, “High on the Holy Spirit.” Suffice it to say, I stayed for two years as a member before having enough.
After leaving this church, I began doing a bit of research on various topics. To quote the Science Channel’s tagline I began to “Question Everything.” Such an endeavor has really changed me, and probably for the better. Education is always a good thing (hence my user name here). I am the happiest and healthiest I have been in a very long time. The only downside is that I find myself struggling with religion.
I really do not have any desire to go to church. I do not care to study the Bible. I find myself drifting away from faith, and that is a very scary thing. If I give up on faith entirely, I’m afraid of what the consequences will be. Will my wife stay married to me? Will my family drift away from me? Religion has only brought trouble into my life.
I left a good job to work in multimedia at a contemporary church. I saw more conflict in this “ministry” position than I ever had in my secular career. I became jaded by church employment and was ultimately fired from my position for changing my membership to another church.
The church my wife and I joined at this time was an Independent Baptist Church. The pastors only taught from the King James Version of the Bible. All other versions were considered perversions. Rules were strict and many. Women were inferior to men, having an alcoholic drink was verboten, and questioning the pastor’s wisdom was very close to being an unforgivable sin. Taking medications for anxiety or depression was considered unnecessary. You only had to be, “High on the Holy Spirit.” Suffice it to say, I stayed for two years as a member before having enough.
After leaving this church, I began doing a bit of research on various topics. To quote the Science Channel’s tagline I began to “Question Everything.” Such an endeavor has really changed me, and probably for the better. Education is always a good thing (hence my user name here). I am the happiest and healthiest I have been in a very long time. The only downside is that I find myself struggling with religion.
I really do not have any desire to go to church. I do not care to study the Bible. I find myself drifting away from faith, and that is a very scary thing. If I give up on faith entirely, I’m afraid of what the consequences will be. Will my wife stay married to me? Will my family drift away from me? Religion has only brought trouble into my life.
By:
EducationFreak
Age:
41-45
,
Male
