Lack Of Self-worthI am not a violent person, nor am I ever in need to physically hurt myself, but currently I am lacking the strength to bring myself out of this deep, black pit.
I am having a hard time seeing the point in my life. Perhaps if I had a child or maybe someone I could always confine in, it would be easier for me to feel a sense of self-worth. Sadly, though, tonight I do not.
I am not writing this as a way to gain pity from anyone, nor am I trying to make friends (believe me I'm not the type of person you'd want as a friend), I'm writing this to relieve myself of these negative and ill thoughts.
I suppose my biggest issue right now is this seeping gut feeling that I am failing this life. I have lost so much of myself in the past couple weeks that I can't seem to find that positive slope I once enjoyed. I keep having these moments when I feel perfect and then, suddenly, that perfect moment is gone and I am surrounded by these negative thoughts. No one I know is able to understand or comfort me.
I just wish I could pause my life and take a break...
boy do I need one.