Going Nowhere With My Job, Life, Everything
Today am feeling fried, totally sexually starved so my brain is fixated southwards looking for some salvation. At the same time my brain is required to focus on tasks assigned to me. I am employed as a Programme Officer -Training, yet I feel that this is not good enuff for me. I need some graowth and challenges some learning so that I am not just stuck in this cocoon of no brainer trainer.
So I asked for some job rotation for some on-the-job experience and have a mentor in the process. The result has been a black out of sorts and I am frustrated. I have never really been involved in program design nor development of concepts or proposals and tenders nor are previous applications made available to compare as a template. I am so ******* frustrated. right now my life just seems like one big mistake and I do not want to feel this way coz I have kids and they need to be confident and have a bright outlook to life.
I am an eager worker and learner but aspects of support, mentoring, guidance, information sharing and training are totally lacking in this organisation .
I believe that given the way my boss is giving me the cold shoulder treatment, it spells doom for me. We have been asked to reapply for our contracts in september yet the contracts were up to the end of the year.
I am not scared of losing my job, I just wish I could find a place where I can experience some growth. I have applied for further studies and will have to vet my choices very well to ensure I get the best possible education, now if only my application for scholasrships and short trainngs could be accepted.
I am scared that if I continue on this road, I am going to have a mental breakdown, I feel like I am going through a melt down. Rescue me please. I have prayed, asked around written letters but I am seemingly yes, stuck in a rut"