13 Years Old, More Mature Then A 20 Year Old

My mother favors my brother who is 18. And my dad favors my sister who is 17. And of coarse no one is there for me. My family is very rude, and not very wise. Me on the other hand is smart and very kind. My sister is horrible, she calls me fat and stupid. She failed math while i am in accelerated math and have a 94. Yet my parents never ground her when she swears, makes a fool of the family, and when she acts like a brat. she gets what ever she wants. she has the biggest room that is redone. i have the smallest. she goes shopping with daddy's credit card and has 2 closets and 2 dressers full of expensive cloths she isn't even grateful for. I have 1 closet full of my dad's suits and my cloths (all k-mart). she has a flat screen tv. i don't even have cable. The only thing i have that she doesn't is a mac laptop. Which i am so grateful for and worked so hard to get it. I do everything to make my parents happy. When my brother and sister lay around i do all of the chores. I get good grades, i hang out with the right sorts of people, i always let down weed and drinking, But they still don't love me. They always say how i can be better. I never feel beautiful, and i never feel like i am good enough. I try my hardest but they just don't care. I am sick of crying every day. I am sick of the suicidal thoughts telling me that it can all be over. I always ignore them but some times it sounds like such an easy way out. I don't have any one to talk about this with. My friends always complain about how they are so ugly and fat, but they are really beautiful and skinny. It makes me think "what do they think of the way i look then?" I just need some one to talk too. Does any one else have issues with family and confidence? I need help. Soon.
polishandproud72 polishandproud72
2 Responses Aug 13, 2010

If you want to talk, I'm here. I understand because I'm a black sheep as well. My mother is very ill, and I am blamed and attacked by my family. I have been verbally abused by immediate and secondary family members for the past year because they look for scapegoats. I don't like feeling incompetent all of the time, but I do. I don't like feeling worthless and degraded, but it happens. I understand the suicidal thoughts; trust me, I'm not brave enough to actually try, but they run through my mind. I don't have anyone to talk to either; but here's a branch if you ever want to talk, I'm here.

I'm in a similar situation. My parents have been seperated for about 3 years and its been drama ever since. My mom has 3 older kids that have a different dad than me and my younger brother. She chooses them over all the time. My 31 year old sister lives with us and i swear shes more needy than my moms younger kids. We are constantly fighting and my mom always takes her side. My mom does whatever she wants for her and never for me. Now my relationship with my mom is kinda ruined and she is mad that i choose to live with my father. She never listened to me when i tried talking to ehr about it and now maybe she realizes. You just need to hang in there. and maybe try talking to them about it. if that dont work just continue being the best kid as possible because in the end it will pay off for you. i took the wrong road and made bad choices because i felt like it was my way of reaching out but it did bad in the end. Just do for you and try not to let it bring you down.