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Not a Drip

A boy that asked me to a formal dance told me that they thought I would evenually drink alcohol and invited me to drink with him. Unfortunately the notion of drinking completely turns me off and led to his destruction (as a friend, acquaintance, whatever) in my world. Alcohol disgusts me. With a father who has been to over 4 rehabilitation programs, I grew up alright. I always knew of my father as 'the jerk who wouldn't like when I saw my mother's side of the family' due to an odd form of discrimination. The older I became, the worse he got as well as the more outspoken I became. Evenually this change in behaviors led to physical confrontations with his dead weight falling on me as well as slight choking around my neck. The choking led to a bite on his arm which the next morning, he remembered and laughed about it, the rudest thing. The only reason he was choking me was because I pulled him away from my mother whom he was kicking on the floor. It breaks my heart that I honestly had to deal with this, and I still do. Hearing the verbal abuse when I was younger led to my now extreme social anxiety and self-consciousness. His demand on my mother for everything created a strong sense of self-reliance in myself. I am hoping for the day when I find someone that loves me and stays with me, not a family member but someone who blends with me.
iwanttobe iwanttobe 16-18, F Apr 19, 2007

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