Not Sure What To Do?

Earlier this year my sister and I had a fallout and as a consequence we are no longer on speaking terms. I have an 8 year old daughter who a few weeks back went to spend the weekend at Grandma's house. Upon her return I discovered that my sister had also been at my Mums the entire time. My daughter has been upset that she can't see more of her Aunty. My Mother's opinion is that I should nurture the relationship between my sister and my daughter. She says I should put my differences aside and not involve third parties in our argument. Sounds reasonable, right?

Yeah it is except for the reason why I am not talking to my sister. You see, in January I had the worst sciatica I could ever imagine and was in terrible pain. One particularly painful morning when my sister came over I was crying (maybe even hysterical) and asked my sister to drive me to hospital because it felt like something had broken in my back. Her response was nothing short of cold and cruel, she didn't offer any comfort, was shouting at me, and even drove the car in a way (wheels screeching, car going sideways) so that I was screaming in pain. When we finally got to the hospital she dropped me out in the street infront of the psych ward and told me to admit myself there, she did a huge burnout and took off. I had to make my own way into A&E with what felt like a broken back. while I was in hospital she drove back to my empty house and cleaned me out of my pain meds sleeping tablets and cigarettes.
Once I got home I text her to see what the hell her problem was and her response was that I was having a pity party and I'm obviously nuts. I apologised for asking her to take me to the hospital and I would never bother her again.
My sister and I had always been close and as far as I knew we didn't have a problem, so this whole episode was a complete surprise and to this day remains a mystery as to why she acted that way. It has been nearly 5 months and she hasn't so much as acknowledged what happened.
To me, more than anything I feel I need to stand up to people who deliberately physically hurt me, I don't deserve to be hurt by anyone but especially by those who are supposed to love me. If someone I loved thought I had deliberately hurt them I would be mortified and would do whatever I could to make things right.
So, back to my daughter. I remain seriously conflicted on where I stand in regards to my sister having a relationship with my daughter. If I am going to protect myself from my sister then shouldn't I be protecting my kids from her too? There are so many different emotions and people to factor into it and I feel I need space and time to deal. After Grandma's house visit I explained to Mum that I should've been informed my sister was coming (It was planned Mum had just "forgotten" to tell me) and I was told I was unreasonable, nothing was resolved and I ended up in tears. So I thought to myself that I won't say yes next time she asks for a sleepover, simple fix.
Yesterday when Mum was visiting she offered to drop off my daughter to her paternal granparent's on her way back home, and without even thinking I said yes because it was convenient as I have trouble driving with my injury. When my daughter returned today she told me how her and Ma did a detour past my sister's house on the way. It's obvoius my Mum is going to do everything she can so that my sister sees my daughter regardless of what I do or say.

I know this is a rather large and undoubtedly boring rant, but I would really appreciate some input here. Am I being unreasonable here? If someone set out to hurt you and wouldn't apologise (family member) what would you do?
deleted deleted
26-30
2 Responses May 20, 2012

If your daughter wants to see your sister let her. Her relationship with your sister is not the same as your relationship with your sister. It sounds like you need to start communicating with your daughter about her feelings and what is important to her. Do not mix her needs up with your own she is a separate person with different experiences and different wants to yours.

i had a fight with my sister we didnt talk 4 two years. I see her occaisionly and we dont really talk on phone. its unfair on my nephews thou. her husband asulted me i didnt call cops cause im not a dog. i ended up gettin lockd up 4 swearing and yelling.