Black Sheep

My parents are narcissists. I am the Family scapegoat. Psychologically and physically abused.
Married twice - both abusive narcissists (actually second husband was a sociopath not narcissist).
I cannot begin to describe the life long horror and pain I have experienced at these people's (and I use the term loosely) hands.
I have only recently come to understand the reality of my situation and therefore heal.
I always new the truth, i always spoke the truth but now i know thats where the problem began.
To believe for so long that I was a "useless trouble making little ***** who deserved everything I got" (knowing that something wasn't right and I was a good person) - is hard to undo.
To finally be able to put into words and understand exactly what happened to me, how I was abused and why
AND to know I'm not alone in this more than I could have ever hoped for.
Azure33 Azure33
31-35, F
4 Responses Jan 29, 2013

I too have attracted a lot of $hitty people. It's a hard cycle to break.

you are not alone, looks like i am also not alone.

i want to know your stories better azure.

You have experienced much greater hardships in your life then me but I know how it feels to be utterly alone and to feel powerless over your life. I think it takes strength and courage to examine the abuse you've been through. I wish you great happiness!

Thank you

Its such a relief to realize there is nothing "wrong" with you. I am glad you can see that now. It sounds like you are on your path to healing and happiness. We are all here for you.

thank you