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Thank You My Little Man

My own childhood was rotten. I had two parents who had neither the patience nor the inclination to do right by myself, my brothers or my sister. I had 18 years of being belted, yelled at and belittled until I got the hell out of the family. The abuse continued for another few years after I left home, although only in increments, as I kept touch seldomly until my mother died in 1997. My father is still alive, although he is a sad lonely and sick old man, estranged from his children.

I always swore that I would be an attentive and loving parent, if ever I had the honour of being a parent. But, I continually put that fantasy at bay, afraid of repeating the mistakes of my parents.

My only child entered this world not long after I celebrated my 43 third birthday in 2007. What a miracle, a blessing! How could I ever imagine loving a single individual more?

From the moment I was privaledge enough to see him enter this world, to this present day. It has been a wonderful journey of laughter, games, exploration and child-like silliness. He grows and develops, physically, emotionally, intillectually and personality-wise at an astounding rate. Every moment is the best moment of my life, and I hope his.

I don`t have rose colored glasses. I know there will be times as he grows when he will dissapoint me, and like-wise I will do the same to him. I know we will clash over silly nonsense, and that he will rebel. Thats all normal.

No matter what the future holds, I know in my heart that my son will enter adulthood knowing he has two parents that have afforded him every opportunity to feel good about himself, to feel unconditionally loved and to chase after the life he desires.

My son is the highlight of my life. I can-not thank him enough for entering my life.

musicmad musicmad 41-45, M 19 Responses May 27, 2009

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Nice :)

Aww... This is sweet.

Dear musicmad,<br />
<br />
It is always my dream to have a loving family of my own because all my life I felt that I've never have one, though sometimes I fear to become monsters my parents are. This story inspire and gave me courage not to let my past interfere to what I can be and what I deserve to have in the future.<br />
Someday, I will have a wonderful family, I know I'll have.<br />
<br />
Thank you for sharing this.<br />
<br />
C

Very well said! The best gift you can give your child is the gift of undconditional love. You will not be dissapointed. I too have a precious child. Consider it a honor to have the privelege of loving and<br />
parenting him. My little man is a big man now and so is the love we share!

I can relate to your story. I have 2 little boys and can't imagine not loving them with every fiber of my being. I can't imagine never telling them I love them or never hugging them. It just isn't an option. I once asked my parents at separate times after they finally divorced how or why they didn't feel about me the way I feel about my boys. Talk about an awkward moment. Lol. <br />
<br />
Thank you for sharing! I love coming across other people who don't use their childhood as an excuse to be a problem adult. I have a feeling you might be like me in the way that it's just not something you have to battle necessarily. Not that you don't have struggles. I'm sure you do as I do, but I mean you're a reasonable person who truly does want to do the right thing if you can figure out what that is. Lol. It's not like we had the greatest role models, after all ;p<br />
<br />
Take care<br />
c

You did well to wait till 43 years old to become a parent. There's a LOT of growing you can do (and did) between ages 18 and 43, that can help you be the kind of parent you want to be, instead of the one that was modeled for you. Well done for standing strong, and saying the abuse stops here and will not be visited on the next generation. If only more people would do that.

It's great to hear when men love being dads, thanks for sharing.

Someone once taught me a very valuable lesson and that is when you plan your future don't include anyone in it. <br />
What she meant is - We tend to envision our children grow up, we get a mental image of them and somehow we expect them to match it and many times they don't, then we tend to be disapointed in who they have become - sometimes it's far off what we saw for them. However if you think about the future and only include yourself in it, you will not be disapointed.. <br />
In other words: Don't have any expectations about your children- let them evolve into who and what they want to be and you'll never be disapointed in them..<br />
<br />
That little bit of advice she gave me that day, saved my relationship with my oldest daughter.

That is beautiful until you get to the negative possible future. Don't speak any self-fulfilling prophecies onto your relationship.

A sweet, sweet story, thanks for sharing it.

you have the right attitude to be a good parent

I'm sure all this is true, as I am a father as well and had these very same feelings at his early ages. I can't wait to read your followup stories after he hits his TEEN YEARS and you begin to experience the WHOLE PICTURE. Those oughta be good...LOL! Mine stunned and surprised me at the end...he's currently a very responsible US MARINE Corporal, working security for commanding officers. But somewhere around age 14 - 16, lost to the world in computer games and hearing him tell us how homework "takes up all my free time," I didn't ever predict that happening. I know..."Yours will be different." We all say that when they're babies. I did, too. LOL...I hope the end in your case is as good as mine was...but trust me, you have more than a few hurdles to cross in the meantime! Good luck...and good attitude so far...keep it up in those dark times that are to come before you see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I enjoyed reading this.

also thanks for sharing u sound like my mum she was also a great parent but she also had rules and i knew them we argued but she keep me on the straigth and nnarrow by being firm even when half my school mates landed up inside i never did all because of my mum

one little thing never get involved in his love life no matter who he choices to be with my wifes parents did this to her with me and well planning on moving away from them she had a great relationship with her parent but they blow it when they tried to stop the wedding now she can't wait to get away from them so if he choices someone u don't like speak once only say u don't think she right if u must but also point out that u love him and that as long as he is happy u are happy

My 2 brothers were also in the same position in their early 40's...and it has been an absolute pleasure watching them enjoy the little men in their lives.

There is nothing more beautiful than to see a man realize what any loving mother does and that's just how special and wonderful children are in our lives. Bravo to you for breaking the barriers, I too had the blessed realization of never wanting to be like how my parents were with me growing up. Your story has made my day, thank you very much for sharing.

Sounds like you and your son have a wonderful relationship! Thank you for sharing this story with us.

Sounds like you and your son have a wonderful relationship! Thank you for sharing this story with us.