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Is It Just Me?

Is it just me or do others notice how much things change when their guy is gone?
How they become insomniac overnight,
How you learn google and the internet don't actually know Everything,
How you gain a sense of pride and dignity (even though your not the one going through the training, yet you are).
How you suddenly want to learn all you can about everything your man is doing and going through,
How you can will yourself to be stronger than you thought you were.
 Does anyone else notice things like these or is it just me?
Oracle2010 Oracle2010 18-21, F 8 Responses Dec 17, 2010

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I defenantly notice these things :) i didnt know how i would make it with my bf has been gone in basic for 53 days i had no clue how i was going to make it...but i am :)like.<br />
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I defenantly notice these things :) i didnt know how i would make it with my bf has been gone in basic for 53 days i had no clue how i was going to make it...but i am :)like.<br />
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Thanks guys your absolutely amazing just hearing back from you helps a ton. I know I'm not alone in this anymore and that's incredible. I keep being told not to tell him that I miss him and how I feel because it makes it harder for them. 'All they should hear is encouregment and how proud you are of them'.

Yes sometimes I feel like I shouldn't show my emotions and especially not to him...But what I found was when I tried to hide my emotions from him it made him more sad and more worried then if I just flat out told him how I was feeling (whether through my letters or the talks we had when he came home from Basic). They don't want you to hide how you're feeling, it's just a matter of not turning into a blubbering mess and blaming him for being gone (they're all afraid that we will resent them for having to leave). It's ok to cry and to get frustrated because we all do that, just try to surround yourself with people and activities and that way you won't be so consumed with missing him. If you need anything just message me.

I defenantly notice these things :) i didnt know how i would make it with my bf has been gone in basic for 53 days i had no clue how i was going to make it...but i am :)

Balance is a tough thing to find. It's a bit different for everyone. Me, I miss him so much I can hardly get through the day, but I don't show my emotions to anyone but him. I don't really have anyone around me to talk to, but if I did, I probably wouldn't talk about how much I miss him. Just because you miss your man doesn't mean you are weak. It just means you're human and you love him. I felt the same way you did for a long time, but I've learned that it's ok to want him home. Try to be proud of him and all he's accomplished, tell him you're proud of him and see what kind of reaction you get. That's what made me find my reality. It's ok to cry sometimes, that doesn't make you weak either. We all do it. But after a good cry, wipe the tears away and put on a smile because your man will be coming back to you and he'll want to see that smile, not the tears. When you feel depressed, get on here and find someone to talk to or write a story. We've all been there and we know how tough it is, and the women on this site are truely amazing when you need support. I hope you feel batter about everything. Don't be afraid to hit the message button if you need to talk.

Do you sometimes feel like you shouldn't show how hard it is on you or your emotions because it's keeping you from being strong? And somehow making you weaker? That if by allowing yourself to miss him and wish him home really isn't going to help? I don't want to focus on him not being here and I wont allow myself to be depressed over it. But half of me is missing and I also don't want to ignore that. How do I find the balance?

No ma'am, you are not the first and you won't be the last. Because of Tyler, google became my best friend (especially when I found the training matrix for Basic Training). The whole experience from beginning to end will show you just how strong you can become and how much you depend on your man versus how independent you are. Don't worry, there are so many women who you can talk to on here (including me) who will help you get through this because we know exactly how you are feeling and will do our best to help you through our own experiences.