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Should I Feel This Bothered?

Okay I know I've been writing a lot on here, but I really need to pour my heart out. My guy made it to San Diego a day later than he was supposed to due to having a cancelled flight...

but he posted something on facebook and this is what it said: got here in sandiago and love the weather waiting for us to go to bootcamp probly not comeing home exept for one day for one person if they r still there

I'm glad he's coming home for me don't get me wrong, but the last part bothers me. If I'm still there? I swore to him and I know I need to put myself in his place and he's probably being told every statistic, but he wasn't even at bootcamp yet and said that...I know he's scared and maybe I'm over-analyzing but I really wish that believed in the way I love him. Then his mom texts me that she probably won't be hearing from him for awhile cause hes ticked at them for some reason..

Is this common girls??
Seizetheday1026 Seizetheday1026 18-21, F 7 Responses Jul 27, 2011

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Yes very common, and just like everyone else, my husband talks to me about how when he's around all the other marines all they seem to talk about is cheaters. How other marine girls on base (who are married do certain things and then have their husband over for a weekend and act like nothing happened, or other marines just go around drinking cause their girl left him or just stuff like that.) It gets them thinking, i'm about to be moving out there, New Jersey with him and at times i notice how these guys get to him cause he'll ask randomly 'beb, you'll never leave me right?' and i mean i love him, simply can't picture my life without him. my future is all planned out, and he's a huge part of it. <3 You know what and who you are, and i'm pretty sure that so does he so keep standing by his side and just reassure him that you're strong enough to remain standing next to him. Others will get stuff in his head but in the end it's you and him who matter so don't listen to your girls when they tell you certain things and hopefully he values your relationship and doesn't listen to others either. good luck(:

Thanks girl, I guess what bothers me is this was happening before he even got there. For instance on of our last nights together I get a call from one of my femal friends and I when I hung up I said love you bye! And I noticed he was being really weird and quiet and I finally got it out of him..but he questioned if I was talking to another guy!! I was so hurt, I don't even talk to other guys and he's thinking this crap before he even gets into boot camp..makes me way worried what he is thinking now.. Sorry to vent, I'm going to prove it to him..I hope he gives me a chance to. Good luck to you as well, and thanks for the response.

I agree with dreaming519. The guys do talk about that stuff. Just stay strong and loyal to him. I suggest writing him letters and reinforcing with each one that you are waiting and can't wait for him to return. I think the more you say it the more he will believe it. :) In my opinion facebook is annoying when it comes to relationships, especially for us when we can't see our guys everyday. I understand what you are saying. I know when I see something posted by my guy I instantly feel like I'm over analyzing it and I sometime let it get the best of me. Don't look into it too much. I also think that sometimes guys post things on fb on purpose knowing that we are going to see what they post. It's annoying and I know sometime I've worked myself up so much I get my stomach in a knot. The best advice I can give is to stay strong, supportive, loyal, loving, and true to him. It may be a lot of work but it's all worth it in the end. Best of luck to you! :) If you ever want to message me please feel free to do so!

Thanks so much, I know how he is and I know thats his way of saying hes coming back just for me and he wants me there..hes just afraid I wont be. Best of luck to you as will and I probably will haha. Have a great day!!

He is just scared sweetie. I got a letter from my guy saying "besides, i will have you forever if you have not not found somebody else already" They are just trying to perpare for the worst case senario even through they don't have to. And in a way they are just asking for reasurance because even the thought of boot camp can make them feel scared and loney. I made a joke out of it- I told him I have a tally under the smack Sean once he gets home for that comment and I told him if I hear anymore of that stuff he is going to be very bruised for graduation. I told him not to listen to his DI and platoon if they talk crap about our relationship becuause he KNOWS better than that.



This is just a way of showing and reassuing him that you can and will make it through it and that you care for him tremendoulsy. <------- I love big words!!!!! xD

haha that made me smile, sounds like something I would tell my guy. I know hes scared and I'm going to prove that I will be here all the way.

I think he is expressing uncertainty, not because he doesn't think you care about him, but because he is making a huge transition in his life. He knows that in a few months, you will not be the same person and he will not be the same person. Young people develop and change all the time. It is hard to find any stability within or without under those circumstances. You will have to keep writing to him and see how it turns out. If it is meant to be, the stability of the relationship will become apparent somewhere down the line. Just play your part and hope for the best. Both of you are fairly young to be making major life commitments.

Yeah..I understand that for sure. Thanks for the advice.

They do hear alot of **** while they are there and it never ends even after boot camp. Rob (my bf) is getting deployed and is in pre-deployment training as we speak. We had a talk a ways back because he was worried about why i would wait for him. He said this because they get told often that they are better off goin through deployment without a girlfriend. They also hear lots of stories of other s/o's cheating while they are gone. So i wouldn't be bothered like Aly said just reassure him over and over. Give him reasons why you want to wait and stuff like that. He just needs to be reminded that your there for him and your not goin anywhere. Stay strong girlie, We're here for you! If you ever need to talk i'm always on.

<3 Renee

I will for sure, thank you Renee..its just upsetting and I know that must make him sick hearing that crap..so I will try to put myself in his place.

I know i feel the same way about it. And good :) I'm sure everything will work out for y'all!!!

Its so common at least it was for me! He would always question me waiting for him! And I'd always reassure him that I would. Once I got his first letter he still questioned me a bit, but I write everyday and reassure him in every letter that I WILL be here for him once he comes home! And I think at that point is when they realize that we are Semper Fi to them! Stay strong! 3 months will go by soooo fast!! <3

I sure hope it goes by fast haha. But I will be here waiting regardless and action speak louder than words..so once he sees I'm still here than he will know 100%. Thanks for the response girl :D

Hey girl,



they hear A LOT of crap ALL the time about their women cheating and their women leaving them why they are gone rather it be boot camp deployed or just stationed somewhere else. It is going to be your duty to him to make him realize that you are not going to be one of those girls. Just write him every day reassuring him that you are still there. My fiance was the same way i think it is really common. Once Trey graduated boot camp and saw me standing there waiting for him he knew that i wasnt going anywhere. he jsut needs that reassurance. I wouldnt let it bother you. Wait for the letters see what they say if he is still acting like that then i would say something to him but for now jsut let it go boys will be boys. Show him you love him and that you arent gonna leave him. Then he will look stupid for evening thinking that. Trey has told me before that he was stupid to ever question me. Stay strong this is a long three months and he needs your support now more than ever dont be angry with him. just let it roll off and start writing him letters. Hope everything works out.



Aly

Thank you so much Aly, I really needed to hear that and I know I will be hear when he gets back, and hearing your story gives me hope that we will be okay. How long were you and your guy together before he went to bootcamp?

We were together for a year and a half before he left for boot camp. I am glad i could help though. Yall will be fine stay postive. =) Message me any time you have any questions i been though it and dont mind giving advice.

I appreciate that so much!