Feeling Numb

My Marine has just been gone for a week and i know i have to deal with the seven months ahead. During the day its like i'm on auto pilot. I try to act like my normal self, but all my friends say that i have a sadness in my eyes that no smile could hide. i don't even talk at home. My mom says that she's worried about me and she can only imagine how i feel, but i don't think that even imagination can go that far. I miss him so much and i wish i could just fast forward to the day at the airport where i'm waiting for him with my heels on. I still haven't heard from him and i know he's busy and in Afghanistan but i can't help the what the **** feeling?!?!? Are there really no phones?? Come on now! Some days are easier than others but this first week has been a *****. For the first time i'm realizing how strong he makes me and how much of my life he makes up. I pray that he's ok wherever he is and he knows that i love him and am waiting for his return. Ladies please tell me that mine isn't the one that doesn't call:(
HisAlwaysFaithful33 HisAlwaysFaithful33
18-21, F
4 Responses Mar 26, 2012

It is so hard....Im sorry :( it feels just like yesterday for me. The first 2 weeks-first month Is the absolute hardest. I was the EXACT same way. I was emotionless, blank and depressed. I'm on month 4 now and its starting to fly by, half way point Is when that starts. Honestly it just depends how much youll hear from him. Some never hear from their man, but I'm lucky and get a phone call every night unless he's on a mission. He just got back from a few week long mission and that was rough. The beginning though it would be a lot longer. So you have to just be as strong as possible and stay BUSY. And know this Isnt forever.

They can call but honestly the first week/month they are so busy they have absolutely no time to call. Try to stay busy!! The more you can do to keep your mind off of the deployment the better. Start a carepackage, email him daily, start a routine of things you wanna do while he is gone. We all have REALLLY bad days. I had a bad week. Things are a lot better now but it will happen again. Its hard being away from the number one person in your life. He is your rock your best friend your everything. He is going through the same thing im sure just a lot more busy than we can ever make ourselves. If you ever need to talk im always here to listen!! :)

Nope, Mine has been gone for about a month and I just got the first email from him a couple days ago. The devistating part was it was 2 sentences long. I'm trying to remember that they are busy and the email doesnt reflect how he feels about me but that he is focused. We have to stay strong and know that just because they dont call or email, they are still thinking about us all the time! Let me know if I can help any...or just if you wanna talk.

I'm so sorry :( you're right, I can't imagine what you're going through. I know that the time is coming soon when I'll be in the same situation but until then all I can say is that my prayers and thoughts are with you and your Marine. Keep your head up and think about just one day at a time...before you know it you will be in those heels!! Message me if you need anything or just want to talk.