I Miss My Marine

The days are growing longer as it moves into summer time, its wedding season and my brother is getting married in late may, it keeps me busy I guess so I don't have to remember that my best friend, my rock, my everything isn't around, and won't be until late June. I find myself looking for more and more things to do and less movies to watch because everything reminds me of him, not that I want to forget but it makes it hurt just that much more, and I love him. I hate going out to events alone because when I look around everyone is talking to their significant other and laughing and holding hands, and it just makes me sad I guess. I'm just sad I want him here so badly to hold my hand and to laugh with me. Plus i dont know if I will be getting a phone call on sunday or not...he promised he'd call as soon as he could, and he is a man of his word (never lied to me once nor broke a promise) but i dont know how much time he gets on the phone and I know his parents are expecting a phone call. If I dont get to hear from him it will make this so much worse, I'm hardly making it to sunday as it is...and I know that some people will read this and think what they've gone through and think I'm just ranting but its very new to me and having the person that you talked to day in and day out suddenly not there to talk to, its a whole new world to me and I dont get support from my family, and my friend's boyfriend has already done three deployments so she says " i dont want to hear it, you cant be like this" but i dont know how to be....theres no handbook on this....at least i dont think there is....i just need time and understanding to get used to this.. =(
StillStrong15 StillStrong15
18-21, F
1 Response May 4, 2012

I'm not meaning to sound mean, I promise. So please read this is a kind tone to yourself :) I dont know if your boyfriend is deployed, MCT ( which it kind of sounds like?) MOS and obviously he's not in boot if he gets to call. But your friend is kind of right. You can't let yourself be miserable and barely make it to the next day or the weekend. I've been through boot, MCT, MOS and we are gearing up for our first deployment ( we just found out today, he wasn't supposed to be deployable, it was a shock, anyways) you have to keep yourself busy and remember it could always be worse so be thankful that it's not. Dont get me your, you can have a bad day here and there and you're allowed to be sad and miss him, but dont let it control your day. I understand its hard when all your friends are with their so and it's wedding season that is hard to be happy and put that smile on .. but fake it til you make it if you have to! : ) stay strong. It all gets better.. kinda ;)

Thanks, ya I know what you mean, normally I dont let it own me, I put a smile on and make it through the day but today was hard with all the wedding bliss going around.. lol

GD I replyed and it didn't load lol. Basically because I'm too tired I just said I have been there too. Last year my best friend was planning her wedding while my husband ( then boyfriend) was at MCT and guard and somedays just plain sucked!