Relationship Problems!

My fiance and I have an amazing relationship and I'm normally so happy being with him, but lately things have totally changed.

He left for Okinawa a month ago and things between us have just really changed. I knew some things would change between us, but I never would have imagined a month ago we would be where we are right now.

The first two weeks of him being gone, things we're fine, we would skype almost every night, and I was happy, he was happy. All was well.

The past two weeks though is a different story. I find myself getting so irritated about the smallest things, and I find myself not being able to trust him. We had trust issues before he left with him talking to other girls about inappropriate things, and then lying about it. But now that he's gone I find myself thinking he is. This is going to sound horrible, but I know I'm just extremely emotional right now, because this separation thing is new to both of us, it seriously takes every ounce of strength in me though not to call him up and say, "I can't do this anymore, it needs to end between us". The reason I don't is because I know in the end I love him, and he loves me, and I want to be with him.

Also, his mom is now getting in the middle our relationship as well, she tells us what to and not to spend our money on (we have a joint bank account), as well as she's trying to tell us to change our wedding date, which is December 20, because she believes it's to close to Christmas.

Does anyone else get beyond frustrating sometimes and just feel like going into the middle of a field and screaming at the top of your lungs, and then coming home and eating a whole carton of ice cream, and watching the Titanic and the Notebook?
CaliforniaGirlfriend CaliforniaGirlfriend
18-21, F
8 Responses Jul 29, 2012

haha I know how you feel. Fighting with your Marine when he's away is the worst feeling... it's so much easier when you can get in each other's face & then be done with it. When he's not around, you find yourself seething after fights & not willing to let things go. But you have to learn to forgive quickly because honestly, it just isn't worth the added stress for either of you. If going out in a field & screaming will help you feel better, do it. But then go back to your man (or computer...) & have a good conversation with him, about why your upset, why you want to move on from it & ta da.... you've survived another day of being a military SO! Although, there has to be trust because without it, the relationship will not survive... normal or long-distance. Good luck!

It's definitely not easy especially with him being so far. I hear many many stories about Japan but if y'all really trust each other nothing should get in the way, if y'all can't trust each other that's going to be really difficult. Plus i'm sure he's crazy busy so honestly i would'nt over think things, it only makes you're mind go crazy even more.

I agree with the other girls, you gotta trust your heart and not let your mind wonder to bad. This is a perfect time to really build trust and communication in your relationship, express your feelings talk to him about, give him a chance to try and open up and show you his point of view. When you do talk though, try to be understanding and gentle, your both going through such a hard time right now. If you start communicationg your feelings without fighting about it he will be much more willing to listen. Good luck girl :)

Yah girlfriend we gotta stay strong, if not we look like failures i pesonally love havin a man that makes me look good and, my family I MUST HAVE THERE APPROVAL like the rest have another man on the side, i know my man is doiun other women like im doin men but its the way it is, and adleast in THE END you will look back as it was a time to grow so get drunk like meOH SMART ONE there is a billboard thgat cost me 10,000 dollars to have posted over the intersection freedom of speech andi know you should love it, the glamour the attn the your a joke

What the?

Can anyone even decipher this mess?

Have you talked to him about how you are feeling?

do not give up. Whatever you do. Trust you heart and not your mind, believe me

Omg this sounds identical to my story only my mom is the problem not his. Hang in there girl its extremely common for things to Get crazyy and trust issues kick in. My only advice really is try to ride it out ur both still adjusting and do ur best to Ignore the mama drama.

I know exactly how you feel and my marine only just left for the first time. But sometimes I get upset and frustrated when I think about how long I have to keep doing this (he has 5 years) and how hard it is going to be but you just have to remember that if you love him you it will be worth the wait. And even though it might feel like it, you won't have to do this forever. Someday he will be done and all of this will be over and you won't have to be away from him ever again. As for the trust problems, me and my boyfriend have a hard time trusting each other too. Right now he is only in boot camp but even now I think who is gonna be sending him letters and who is he gonna write back. And then when I think about him being out of that and then leaving and having more free time I worry even more, but I think that is normal relationship worries. You just have to remember that he loves you and is just as worried about you being faithful to him as you are. Reassure him that you aren't going to do anything while he is gone and that you will always be there for him. And if he is even somewhat of a good guy, he wouldn't let you wait for him and go through all this if he didn't want to be with you and only you. This is not going to be easy but it will be worth it. Just try not to think so much about the things you worry about and think about more positive things like seeing him again or how this is going to make you and your relationship a lot stronger. I hope that I helped, stay strong girl you'll be ok (: