He Invaded My Privacy

For a while hes been asking me if he could read my journal. Growing up my journal was my safe haven where i could write what i felt without being judged. So naturally i told him NO he could not read it unless i felt like i was ready to share that part of my history with him. Today while on the phone he told me he read both my journals this past Sunday while i was asleep. I know he wasnt BSing me because he directly quoted some of the things i wrote. I had vary dark times in those journals and for him to just invade my privacy like that hurts. Im not a saint and i wrote some pretty messed up things in there...but they werent ever ment for him to read. He told me some of the things i wrote hurt him, and if he had known all that back then that he wouldnt have put up with everything we went through. But honestly im not sorry because i told him way before hand that i was messed up. I feel so invaded and i know alot of you ladies would love to talk to your man right now, but i cant even stand the thought of hearing his voice at this moment. Funny thing is i told him last night that i was ready to share it with him, but i guess he was already a step ahead of me...im so hurt right now. All i feel is angry, hurt, and blank. Dont get me wrong hes an amazing husband but damn....i never thought he would go this far to try and understand my past. blahh :(
violetviola violetviola
22-25, F
6 Responses Nov 27, 2012

I know exactly how you feel and how mad you are. My h with thru my Facebook everything on my Facebook. There was nothing on there to hide except a few rants to my close friend when him and I were fighting...... it took him a few days tto tell me. And he ddid it the same way, while I was sleeping. I mean it's not as personal as ajournal but its the fact he invaded my privacy.... then had the nerve to be a little mad about certain things. Oh man girl, im right there with you! I was just as mad!!

Yeah i told him wayyy before he read it that he would get upset if he saw it so that's exactly why im not sorry he got upset

id be pretty pissed off too! Whether its a journal or just facebook inbox, or texts. Ive never been married but id like to think when two people get married its because you trust them, not like when your dating because you dont need trust to just date. Id be furious that he did something so out of line, i have a lot of journals too but on my laptop so if my husband was to do that to me after is specifically said no id want to kick him. I think you just need time i wouldnt talk to him right away, but thats just me i like to digest things for a couple days and then approach the situation.

yeah i told him i needed my space for the rest of the day and we didnt talk until that night and i was more upset than just angry but yeah we are alot better now :D

I'm mad for you and no just no!! You dont do that then get upset because of the stuff you wrote because he was snooping i wont lie i'd be beyond furious right now and you have every right to be mad!! hope you feel better and i hope he wakes up fast because you are one of the people that are pretty amazing i know you love him you just over angry and you have every right to be!! <br />
to molly how you even get to the points you come to i have no idea do you just say things because you can or what exactly!!

I have to say you are pretty amazing yourself if you still think he's amazing after reading that. EVERYONE is entitled a private space - that journal is yours. I don't know you or your hubs - but just reading that he read your PRIVATE stuff makes me wonder why he has trust issues with you? One of two things comes to mind...A) - he has trust issues with you because he's doing something "untrustful" himself (I know that isn't a word - I made it up to get my point across) or B) you've done something in the past to make him not trust you. Either way - honey - you've got a lot more to work on than just your anger for him reading your journal. You, doll, are a better person than me because I would have put him out on his ***. I'm not saying not to forgive him for this - that's up to you. But there is something else going on that drove him to read your private thoughts. Sweety - do not ever let anyone disrespect your privacy. You get to have that whether he likes it or not just as he gets to have his - whatever that may be. Make sense? Good luck. :-)

you have a right to be mad, guys dont understand what we go thru and alot of girls write to make there self feel better. i know me and my fiance were bestfriends first bc i didnt want a boyfriend bc of my past and he knew everything about me and still wanted to be with me and i do mean everything bc i have a hard time trusting girls so he was who i opened up to. i know in time yall will talk it out bc true love conquers anything. if you need to talk to vent to someone feel free to message me. i hope for the best for you!

I believe that he was wrong for betraying your trust that way. He should have waited until you were ready to share and he wouldn't even have had to wait that long. Besides when you were ready as he was reading different things you could have been able to explain exactly where you were during that time in your life mentally etc..., so that he could understand that that was your past.
I hope that he'll try to make it up to you in time and that y'all can work past it. Right now you deserve to feel upset and angry though...IMO.