Really Stres My Bf Say He Loves Someone Else And My Emails Hurt Him

I been having a issue with my bf .In sep he was home after 2 year and everything was fine .Now things are going back down hill again.I am getting to the point where I am tired of those ups and downs but I know its part of the reationship but him being in the military dont make things better.When he was home he was going to ask me to marry him he did not cuz not being state side.Since he went back to his station he only has 4 months left soon then he comes home and he state side.2 weeks ago he told me he still wants to marry me and we need to start saving up for the wedding .He been trying to spice up the reationship and tell me to try to have sex with one of his friends and want to watch .I keep going back in forth yes then no .He said to add this girl and at first said no but then I did add her.She was telling me how she hope me and his reationship are ok and that she hope we can work throw what we are going throw .I talk to my bf and I was like I hope you dont mind me talking to her and he like oh this is acawad becuase I love you both .I did ask him about it and he like remeber I told you I love her to .I message him another email about how if he dont want me to talk to her I wont and dont understand how he can love her and me .I did talk about how I miss him and how I feel like we barly talk anymore.He wrote to me on how the uncertainty of everything is draining on him .What did he mean by this ?When I wrote to him about how I felt about him loving tow girls at once and if he dont want me to talk to her is the email the same thing as talking like communcication or is it this uncertainy I dont understand what he saying ?He told me that she dont want him to break up with me for her.But I dont know if she loves him or not becuase my bf the one who said I dident think I would get those feelings for her.He talk about how its not fair that im 50 50 with her he not sure who he loves more.He talk about how he hopes she can let me and him be togeather.What dose she have to do with this ?He told me she has feelings for him but dont want him to break up with me.He told me its hard to keep the spark becuase being far.My letters dont get there anymore and it keept the reationship alive .But he gose on about how he going to try to break it off with her but then he say dump him.I dont understand any of this.As soon as I tell him I will talk to him in a week he like me and her are not togeather.Please help me there so much back in forth and stuff.Do you think this is all my bf issue ?
kellner27 kellner27
18-21, F
4 Responses Dec 10, 2012

I'd leave him. If you don't know that you love me/ you can fall in love with another girl while your with me, that's major red flag. Personally I like to be the only woman in my mans life. I demand respect and love from him. This back and forth I love you both sounds like a load of crap. Find a man who treats you right and leave this crazy guy behind! Love is a roller coaster, but it's more like a kiddie coaster with mild ups and down that doesn't make you vomit. What your on is the monster of all roller coasters. Good luck girl!

I'm actually lost in this i'm not sure how this even happened or what you were trying to say. Here's the thing every relationship is a product of where you want that relationship to go no relationship no matter how long or how much you love him should be this hard you constantly compromising for him and he wont budge on anything i get you love him but you deserve someone who respects you for you and the person you are stand up and starting laying down some laws if he loves and respects you he will cut out all the BS and step up and be the person he should be - sweety why would you want to marry someone who treats you like a play thing you better than that he is messing with your head and its not cool start standing up for yourself and if he doesn't like it then he he was never worth your time or effort in the first place and you'd be way better off!!

I couldn't really understand your message but I definitely agree with semperfigirl! You need to tell him what your okay with and what your not okay with doing. Sorry sweetie but sounds like he's playing games if you were to ask me. I really hope things gget better for you girly. If you need some one to talk to feel free to message me.

I could hardly even keep up.. Sounds like an awful situation. But honestly, I know this sounds weird but man up! Yell at him, get angry and demand answers. If your passive, he'll be passive and not let you know what's really on his mind. Okay, maybe don't yell :p but be stern for sure, let him know you mean it.