Don't Push Me Away...

So, my guy isn't a Marine yet but it seems like he'll be leaving for boot in Aug (although he's looking to see if he can move the date up)
Anyways, for maybe about 2 weeks straight, we've had a lot of fights. I don't know why, but he seemed to be fighting me a lot, and during this time, he seemed a little off. He ignored me a whole lot and just didn't seem like himself. So one day last week during a fight, I finally brough it up to him. I said to him that I don't know why he's been acting the way he's been acting, but even during our fights he seemed off. I said that I don't know what's going on with him and I can't help him if he doesn't talk to me. I also told him I felt like he's changed.
Finally, after a long while, he was saying he wants to be kind of distanced from me. I asked him to come over, and even while he was here, we got into a HUGE blow out, it was very ugly. There were a lot of anger and a LOT of tears. We then, towards the end got to the subject of why he's been different and weird lately.
Turns out, he was being more of an *** cuz he's scared. He's scared of me thinking I made a huge mistake talking to him. He's going to be gone for three months and I'm going to be home free and what if i meet someone I really liked and wanted to be with but I can't be with said guy because I'm attached to him? He felt that by trying to distance himself and not share feelings we won't be too attached so that when I find someone new, I can just dump him and keep it moving.

WOW he makes me seem really mean and heartless, I swear I'm NOT like that at all lol. I have NO plans on dumping him while he's in boot camp and I said that to him. I know that it'll be hard on me the first day he's gone, or even the first week, first month, or the whole damn thing, but I'll find myself things to do, I'm not gonna just dump him.

I told him that he should definitely take a chance on everything, and he decided he will. Hopefully he's not ever going to try distant himself from me so it'll make it easier for me to find someone else. Such CRAZY talk.
MochaChocolatte MochaChocolatte
3 Responses Jan 21, 2013

Aren't their crazy moments just the best *eyeroll* lol, it's seriously the most frustrating thing when they get these notions and instead of talking about it they start fights and pull away. But i'm glad you got him to talk about it in the end and i'm sure he'll need reassuring a million more times but you've got this, and he'll figure that out eventually (even if after seeing that your not going anywhere he does this a hundred more times) Keep at it girl, and remember we'll all be here supporting you through boot and all the other adventures :)

I know! He's crazy haha he just always assume he knows how I feel or what I'll do. I'm not gonna leave so he was wrong. Thanks I know I'll need it

Yeah My Bf Pretty Much Did The Same. But We Just Talked About. We Never Fought Before He Left For Boot. But He Was Just Scared Of Getting That "Dear John" letter. It hurts knowing hes thinking of you cheating while hes away. Then the girs who dont have a military man dont understand what we go through while hes away. Its not like we'll up and leave. We're In This for The Long Haul. It Will Hard Trust Me But You'll Get Used To It. And Then When The Letters Start Coming. Its The Best feeling In The World!

AJ was the same until I pointed out that he's been around my whole life and I still picked and basically it was my choice and I chose and that i could be just as stubborn as he is. It's always just round about when he's about to deploy or during deployment this happens remember they the ones leaving and with that comes huge amounts of guilt. I also find that on occasion i try and pick fights with him because its easier to say good bye but he's onto me about that too - it's the hard part the only thing you can do is try and reassure him why you with him and prove that by just being there for him!! Good luck i know its tough!!

Yeah that's true, they do feel guilty about leaving, and thanks =]